The Two Sides of a Golden Coin

yes or no?
- Can't there be something between yeses and nos?

black or white?
- Can't there be a varying tone of grey?

forget or remember?
- Can I not forget but don't remember?

I once made a decision that I tried very hard sticking to it, but that time period that I drew up is coming to an end. What lies in store for me 46 days later? I really do not know, and I don't want to know. I want to be happy, but happiness can be derived from two opposing things, or should I say, sadness will come from these same two opposing things.

I have something that I've been guarding very tightly. I have from long always been in danger of losing it, but somehow or another, I've found a way to get around things without losing this. But is there any good for me to keep holding onto this?

I think I've been running away. Running away from making a decision.
但是逃避能解决问题吗？

Or maybe I need to find another form of support, to give me a valid reason not to face all those dreaded decision, or to force to to make another form of decision, but then again, can I keep myself to another form of commitment?

It's times like this I really hate myself. Or can I safely say that I wish I'd never met you?

Now playing this song over and over again...

I feel like her...