Sunday, July 31, 2005

A Tribute to Qiu Jinwei

I think he'll kill me if he sees this, but I'm so proud of this that I want more people other than him to see it. This is like a master piece lor... A handmade card by someone none other than me! I used my index finger and occasionally my middle finger to do it, so it is hand made! Fingers are part of my hand mah...

It was his birthday, yesterday, two days ago, whatever, and I spent like an hour doing up this, mainly because I had nothing better to do. And I wasn't obliged to do anyting of this sort for him cos he'd already received my present eons ago and my sms greeting when I woke up early in the afternoon. But he's so lucky that I was bored and I found this great picture of him hidden in a little obscure corner of my folder. I don't know who managed to capture such a shuai shot of him, maybe Kenny ba... wahaha~ Kenny, I retract all my scoldings to you can anot? You really aren't that bad a photog la... haha~


I'm thinking of doing a similar one for Xumin before she leaves, but the problem is that I do not have any pictures of her. What the heck... She was like my best friend in secondary school and yet I don't have any photos of her?! Yea... Those were the days before there was such a thing as digicam or handphone cam so didn't have any occasion to take pictures of/with her.

So now, resolution of the month, I, Joan Ang resolve to take more photos with more of my friends so that I can have a memory of them in times of needs. And also so that I can do up more tributes to my good friends to thank them for staying by my side in times of difficulties. Although I'm pretty disappointed to say that most of the time my friends aren't there when I need them. hai... Where was Dicky this afternoon when I was so going to burst?

I know friends aren't obliged to always be there for me, but just that moment when I really need a someone, I get disappointed. I'm not complaining, really, just a bit musing on such. At least I know that when my friends are free, they can be there for me!

Saturday, July 30, 2005

English for Foreign Speakers 101

I never thought I would be in a position to teach someone English, especially if something like this occurred to me just yesterday...

jal5eva (17:49:37): so u want how?
stupiddiverboy (17:49:57): i want how?
stupiddiverboy (17:50:04): what kinda english is that?
jal5eva (17:50:44): sucky english lor
jal5eva (17:50:51): me brain spoil liao le
jal5eva (17:51:02): cannot think straight le lor

So, my English was slammed by someone yesterday, could I today instead teach someone else English? Apparently the answer is yes cos the person whom I taught is a foreign speaker. To a foreign speaker, Joan with her 20 years of knowledge of the English language is a master.

My student? Someone who picked me up from MSN messenger. Kind of sad...

It's a Saturday afternoon and it's raining. Joan can't go shopping in the rain cos she's too lazy to carry an umbrella and she doesn't like the rain to ruin her clothes and hair and hat and shoes and whatever that's on her. It can rain some other time as long as Joan's not going shopping. So, since it was raining and I had nothing better to do other than hang out online, and my friends are ignoring me cos they are busy, so when this weird guy came by I decided to entertain myself for a while. It was pretty entertaining, and ego boosting. Especially when my ego was burst by that stupid guy yesterday.

I am pretty proud of my English actually. After all the memorising of grammar tables and weird stuff, and being able to differentiate writing styles and accents of different sorts of English, I'm still not bad an English speaker, I think.

Lesson 1: Hot

[] Colin .. says:
It's hot.
- xxoos - says:
what is hot?
- xxoos - says:
what is it that is hot?
[] Colin .. says:
hot means very high degree.
- xxoos - says:
[] Colin .. says:
- xxoos - says:
what is it that you are talking about is hot?
- xxoos - says:
not temperature
- xxoos - says:
temperature is high
- xxoos - says:
the weather is hot

This somehow reminds me of the "Mir ist heißt." and the "Ich bin heißt."

Lesson 2: short forms

- xxoos - says:
omg=oh my god
- xxoos - says:
wtf=what the fuck
- xxoos - says:
but dont use it on me

Somehow, one of the first few things one can learn about the language is the vulgarities. I mean, you can not understand Hokkien but you definitely know how to say kaninabeichaocheebye, right? And this also reminds me of "Ich habe ß gelernt." Scheißer. pretty sad, but that's how the earth rotates.

Lesson 3: yeses and nos

- xxoos - says:
[] Colin .. says:
I don't know 'yup'?
- xxoos - says:

- xxoos - says:
[] Colin .. says:
what's mean nope
- xxoos - says:

Luckily the "ja"s and the "nein"s are not as complicated as the "yup"s, "ya"s, and godknows what. What I didn't understand was more of the use of "nie". I thought it was "never" but not everyone uses it that way. "doch"s are another complicating matter, but I think I'm getting the hang of the "doch"s already. "Nein" "Doch" "Nein" "Doch"... lol~

Lesson 4: articles

[] Colin .. says:
How is weather?
- xxoos - says:
how is the weather?
[] Colin .. says:
How is the weather?
- xxoos - says:
the weather is singapore is very hot and humid
- xxoos - says:
but today it is raining

[] Colin .. says:
my job is developer
- xxoos - says:
is a developer
[] Colin .. says:
a .
[] Colin .. says:

It's only "the" and "a" and he has problems with that. How can I not complain that I cannot cope with "der" "die" "das", "ein" "eine" "ein", and when there are such things such as akkusativ and dativ, "den" "die" "das", "dem" "der" "den", "einen" "eine" "ein", "einem" "einer" "einem". And I need to match the "der" "die" "das" correctly somemore!

Give a short background on this Colin guy. He's Korean and has been learning English for a couple of years. He's "envy" of me that my "English skill" is good, but he didn't take into account that I have been learning English ever since I was born. My first audible word uttered out of my mouth was "Papa", I spent two of my most formative years in England, I can write 2000 blog entries on hand like that, I speak English every day every hour, my brain processes in English. BUT my Chinese is also not that ba leh... And My Singlish also can make it one leh... So is it that I'm just smart? lol~

Actually I do admire his courage to want to know more English speaking people and take the initiative to converse more in English to improve. I'm not as hardworking as I think I should be, so maybe that's why my German is still quite cmi. Even after one year of studying and one month of immersing myself in the country, I'm still not getting quite the hang of it. Maybe I should emulate him and look for a German to converse with. Any Germans out there? Preferably someone who can correct my grammar, my German grammar sucks. Perhaps if there was something like grammar tables for me to memorise that might work?

This reminds me of once someone asked me when do I know how to use "I" and "me", I couldn't give an answer. I said it just sounds right. Then when I was in Germany, I asked a native speaker, my host's little daughter, when do I use "Ich" and "Mich", she gave me a look like I was from outer space. That's a difference between a native speaker and someone who's learning the language. Funny how these doesn't occur in Chinese.

Suddenly I've this urge to do EL1101E and CL1101E. wahaha~ I think I might have enough level 1000 mods to fit that around, maybe when I'm in dire need of UEs or exposures...

Friday, July 29, 2005

One Week

I wouldn't have been able to go through last weekend and this whole week if not for my Chinese Drama. I'd like to send out my gratitute towards all my fellow exco people even though they've no idea where they've helped me out. To my fellow exco, much thanks to you. To a certain person, I might not be beheaving myself recently, but I still thank you for all the accompaniment you've rendered.

As I was saying about my rough patch, it surfaced again, rougher than before. Okay, not exactly as bad as it was previously, but it is making my life rougher than ever. These are difficult times, for me and all those around me. Especially now is towards the end of the month, things are getting worse, yea... PMS red alert status now amber.

But now it's in bright daylight, so I'm not such of a pessimistic, so I shall talk about the highlights of this week, the downpits, maybe later ba...

I made a new friend this week. From my Chinese Drama. I was supposed to meet him and Jinwei at Bugis last Saturday. I've never met Jinsen before, and have absolutely no recollection of him even though Jinwei and Audrey tried to describe him to me, so I took it that I don't know him. Back to Saturday, I called Jinwei to ask them where they were and proceeded there to look for them. Since I've no idea how does Jinsen looked, I tried to spot Jinwei among the crowd, but I couldn't find him. Then this hand suddenly waved at me. On a second thought I thought he might be waving at someone behind me, so I acted like I saw his hand but didnt see it, then I also didn't dare turn back to check if he was waving to me or to someone else cos it would be very rude if he was really waving to me and it would be very awkward for me if really there was someone behind me.

Then I tried to walk over casually to check him out, then he said, "Hello Joan, I'm Jinsen."

"You know me ah?" I asked, very surprised. Then I felt very bad. Erm... Yea...

But he's a nice guy la. Pretty surprised the he was a Singaporean cos based on what I heard from Jinwei and Audrey I always have this image that Jinsen was a PRC. No offense or anything, just they way they put him to sound like, like speaking good Chinese, as opposed to Jinwei's horrible Chinese... wahaha~

That was on Saturday.

On Sunday, my Scriptwriting subcom held this talk session at the Esplanade library.
Please visit for more details. Check out our posters, I'm one of the poster girls~ But I don't really look good in it. I'm not supposed to look good in it anyway...

our set of 4 posters

But the talk session at the Esplanade was a huge success, as far as I think. There was a larger crowd than I expected, check out the pictures sia...

crowd at Esplanade library at our talk session

I expected the seats to be filled but I hadn't expected the seats to be packed that closely together. But what filled the seats up that quickly was that most people came in batches. For each school coming down to listen, they'd bring like 15 of their students. But it wasn't only about the students, there were quite a lot of walk-ins too, thanks to a nice little column in the Zaobao.

These were our guest speakers that day...
our guest speakers for the day

I'll talk a little about them here. Peter Sau is our Chinese Drama tutor, he's really a cool guy, I caught a performance of his some time ago, Water Station, it was pretty fine, I should say. I also managed to attend one of his previous lessons last year, and it was not bad, I'd say of all the lessons that I had with Chinese Drama last year, I learnt the most from his, not just learnt the most but also had the most fun.

I had a chance of meeting Ng How Hwee once when I did attachment at Dramabox when I was in TJ's Chinese Drama. He wrote the play Fugitive, the one which I was helping out for my attachment. I liked Fugitive, it was one of the best plays I've ever watched, as in the script is really meaningful and I thoroughly think that it's very saying.

I've never heard of Huang Xiaoyi or Lin Haiyan before, but that doesn't mean that they are not popular just that I'm a bit ignorant. bleaghz...

Li Xie, or I'd like to call her Baobao as she was previously known as, Lin Baobao. She was a very popular dj back when I was listening to the radio but she left the station to pursue drama. That was also when she adopted the name Li Xie. I had the chance of meeting her when I was with Dramabox. She intrigued me with her passion for drama and the extent she went to pursue her dream. I do love drama, but to make that much sacrifices, I don't think it's possible for me. If there's one local drama personnel that I admire, it's her. I truly admire her courage to pursue Chinese drama in a society where acting in English can earn you more, or remaining as a popular dj can provide you with a more than comfortable life. She gave up all that for this. *salute*

Caixiu and Loki were our student representative speakers for that day. Caixiu is a HCJC student, I don't know her. Loki is Loki~ hehehe~ Yea... How should I say about Loki leh? I know he reads my blog, so well, hello Loki~ Read Loki's comments in my blog if you wanna know more about him.

Back to my week, Monday had rehearsals, not bad I think, we've progressed quite a bit. Tuesdays and Wednesdays I was stuch in MPSH2 for Matric fair, manning booth. Check out my pictures! hehehe~

our booth
I came down on Sunday to help with the booth decor before heading back down to Esplanade lor. Nice nice nice~

jio-ing freshies at matric fair

sian people manning booth
There wasn't really a huge mass of people like last year during my matric fair, instead the freshies came in controlled batches and well, there were quite a lot of free time for us to stone. Check out these stone statues... hehe~

From one of the sponsors, Junming helped us kopped.

In between all that for last week I still managed to find time to cry. It's kinda funny now to think about that, but well. I told myself that I've to remain strong and not collapse, but I'm faltering. I know I cannot change how things are, but for the moments with Chinese Drama, and the ding-dings, I can be happy, truly happy and for that moment forget all the earthly problems. And oh yar... Most of the ding-ding cover is blown. My cover got blown cos of the booth duties, and the rest, haha... baozhong sia~

I also managed to fit in a dinner gathering with my Freiburgers. I so miss them, after being with each other, hearing the Kitty Club's lame jokes, for one whole month, of course I'd miss them. Everybody's moving on liao. Of my trip there was this pair which coupled up during the trip, but now, everything was left in Freiburg. hai... Then there's another whose infatuation on another became public among us and while the person is trying to leave everything behind and carry on with life, the past comes back to haunt. It is kinda saddening...

Next up, Oriental Suite, a centennial celebration performance... I'll be working on that!

Friday, July 22, 2005

Downfall of History

I went to watch this German film, Downfall, Der Untergang. It describes the downfall of Hitler and chronicles the last days of the Nazi Germany.

I'm not going to rave on about how great Hitler was or wasn't, nor am I going to slam the Jews. In fact, this film left out most of the controversy and merely described and chronicled facts, the course of events. After doing debates for History for so long, it was nice to just sit back and watch how the events unfolded. The film was in German. I tried not reading the subtitles, but gave up after 5min cos my German's really pathetic. I also couldn't catch most of the trennbar verbs, ended up very reliant on the subtitles. hai... When can I watch a German film without reading subtitles? Yes, I did watch Barfuss without the subtitles, but that's not the point. hehe~

It was pretty depressing in that in the film, almost everyone died. Okay... Everyone died sooner or later in History, but the point was that there were quite a lot of scenes of death. People were killed, people were bombed, people were executed, people killed themselves, people killed other people. All they did were for what they believed in. Some believed in themselves, or Hitler, and killed others who did not share their sentiments. Some people believed in themselves and went against Hitler, and killed those who believed in Hitler. Some killed themselves for the beliefs they did not want to lose. Some killed their loved ones for reasons justifying their beliefs.

Some scenes that really touched me.

The most touching scene I thought was the deaths of the Goebbels. Joseph Goebbels was the Minister of Propaganda for Nazi Germany and an ardent supporter of Hitler, but what most people don't know is that Goebbels was not an original Hitler supporter. Goebbels started out in the Nazi party under the command of the Nazi leader whom Hitler toppled and Goebbel's loyalty was originally with him, and not Hitler. What made Goebbels change his mind about Hitler was after he met the great man himself. Goebbels was instantly taken in by Hitler's rhetoric and ideals. Ever since then, Goebbels became Hitler's trusted man. And he did everything he could to win that trust. I've went totally off course liao, anw... The deaths of the Goebbels started out with Hitler's death, Goebbels and his wife then made plans to kill off their children before going off themselves. Frau Goebbels first made the children drink sedatives so that they would fall asleep. After they've slept she fed each of them with a cynaide capsule, bestowed on them by Hitler himself. After making sure that all the chilren have died, she and Goebbels went out and prepared gasoline. Goebbels dressed himself in his proper attire and wore his gloves. He shot first at his Frau, then at himself. After the two gunshots, his subordinates came out and poured gasoline over their bodies to burn.

Hitler said this, if he wanted to die he did not want the enemy to get his body then showcase it in some museum, hence he wanted his body to be thoroughly incinerated. Goebbels thought so too. I think if you really believe in a cause, and that cause is on a losing ground, the only way out would be death. Surrender can never be an option. Apparently Hitler thought so too. It's the same as the Japanese code of honour. When the Japanese were losing the war, all major generals commited suicide one after another, same was it for Hitler's Germany. Before Hitler's death, Hitler bestowed cyniade capsules on his loyal men and these loyal men on hearing the fall of Hitler's Germany took the capsules.

There was this scene, a doctor was talking to a diplomat before the news of Germany's capitulation was broadcasted. The doctor was telling the diplomat that no enemy could touch him as he was protected my diplomatic laws, but the diplomat told the doctor as plainly as things could get that he was going to go after Hitler as he had received one of Hitler's capsules, there was no other road for him. Straight after the news of capitulation was broadcasted, the diplomat popped the capsule into his mouth and went, the doctor could only watch it all with widened eyes.

Being a history student, I'd known the deaths of most Nazi leaders even before the film. It was pretty heavy trying to watch a film while knowing the ending. Hitler would marry Eva Braun and straight after their marriage they would commit suicide. The Goebbels were also going to commit suicide. But what surprised me were the deaths of Himmler and Goering. I also thought that these two were also fiercely loyal to Hitler, especially Himmler whom Mr Thompson said that he always did the Nazi salute to Hitler even through the telephone. Himmler tried to conceal himself and escape but was caught, Goering commited suicide. surrendered, commited suicide in prision. What else can he do other than die? It would be humiliating for him to stand on trial.
I did an analysis of this matter before. I still stand firmly to what I believe in. If you want to die, die with dignity. Dying in the hand of the enemy as a loser is not dignified. There was another scene of this guy who ran away from the camp hoping that he could escape death. He ended up whiling time away at a brothel totally wasted. The Nazis came after him and dragged him away, but he resisted to put on his coat first. He was still resisting when he was about to be executed, but when he realised that death loomed near, he straighted his uniform, his executioner too gave him the time to straighten his uniform and his hat before one last Hitler salute. At least he died with that bit of dignity left.

Death is easy, but the matter is how you are going to go.

Hitler is a history student after all. He knows what would become of him if he surrendered. In the film he and some of his generals had this mentality, they've already surrenderred once. Surrenderring twice in a lifetime would be too much for a man to take it. A man... At least Hitler was a man despite his Parkinsons disease, or his rumoured missing of a testicle.

Yea... I am too a history student, I forgot. I met Mr Thompson the other day. I was around the school putting up posters for my Chinese Drama club when I spotted Mr Thompson at Business. Naturally I went up to him and said hi, then I asked him what he was doing here. He was here for a history seminar. I glanced over and saw words like "globalisation" and "economy" in the title, then this follows...

MT (for Michael Thompson, not Mr Thompson... lol~): This is the new history course. The new history for our students.
jal: NOOOOO... You can't call that history! That's current affairs.
MT: That's NEW history.
jal: NOOOOO... And I'm still a history student. What use will my knowledge of history bring to me?
MT: Then maybe you should consider your career options.
jal: (stunned) NOOOOO...

Mr Thompson's last line really killed me. I know what history is, history is events that happened long ago, and we are examining them now. Globalisation and economy are not history, they are current affairs. I know it, I know it. I just watched that damned Hitler film, I know my history from my current affairs. And there was Mr Thompson, the guy who did his Masters for History at the University of Manchester in a backdrop of a family of accountants, who tried out as an accountant as his first job but reverted back to history not long after, telling me to RECONSIDER MY CAREER OPTIONS?!!! NOOOOO...

Then again, I really pity him. After so many years of history, he has the heart to tell his student not to continue with history, he should be more disappointed than I am.

Maybe one day, history will end up as something only to be seen in films. It is pretty ironic that it was after watching Downfall that I was to meet Mr Thompson. All those I know about Nazi leaders commiting suicide one after another were all told to me by him.

Saturday, July 16, 2005

What would you do if...

Another taken from Rozie's blog... I don't know what's wrong with me lately, but it does seem pretty interesting to do these, and you guys can get to know this girl a little bit better.

What would you do if...

Your crush suddenly asked you out?
- I'd be delighted.

You walk into an elevator, and see a couple making out?
- I'd be damn jealous. I'd not go into the same elevator as them, but I think I won't be feeling good for the rest of the day. Recently couples making out and happy families seem to irk me a lot. Yea... The green apple is up again...

You are trapped in a building about to explode?
- I'd call my love ones and tell them I love them.

You were granted one wish?
- I'd ask for infinite amount of wishes. Yes, I am greedy.

A guy suddenly kisses you?
- If I don't like that guy, I'd probably pull back from it. If I seen it coming I'd probably pull away from him even before he can kiss me. If I like him, I'd be kissing him back definitely. Then again, maybe not. Maybe I'd still pull back a little to act a bit shy and reserved. haha~

You won a date with your celeb crush?
- You know, I still want to marry Wubai. I'd use that little time during the date and make him fall so in love with me that he'll divorce his wife for me. wahaha~ But I don't think it's possible of me ever winning a date with him. Don't think his wife would allow him to go on dates as prizes, especially with cute sweet young girls like me. haha~

Your boyfriend breaks up with you?
- If I didn't see it coming, I'd be devastated. Maybe I'll try and cling onto something, but if it's really over, then I can't really do anything about it, can I? If I'd seen it coming, I won't really be that devastated. I'd accept it, then move on with my life. I'd also like to know his reason for the break up. If he's going to break up with me for another girl, both of them will get hell from me. wahaha~

You fail your exam?
- I can't imagine that happening. It's really shit sia... But the only thing I can do is to buck up for others lor.

Your computer crashes?
- I'd die. touch wood sia. I'd really die. I've 4 gig of photos inside my laptop without back up. I WILL DIE!

Your good friend betrays you?
- Then that person shall cease to be my good friend anymore. As simple as that. And that person will get hell in return too. Now thinking about it, I'm a pretty vindictive person. You treat me well, I'll treat you better. You give me shit, I'll return you hell. But there are exceptions of course. If I love you, I'll accept hell with no complains. I'm after all a masochist. yea...

You miss your exes?
- SMS, IM, telephone call, email, snail mail... I am after all a pretty nostalgic person...

You can say something to the person reading this right now, what will you say?
- Can you return me a favour and do this thingie too? You can do it in your blog and send me think link, or you can do it in my comment page, can? Please? Thank you...

On a last note, tomorrow Harry Potter and the Mud Blood Prince would be out. What would you do if both you and your sister are fans of Harry Potter? Who gets to read the book first, presuming that you will but only one book to share, or would you rather buy two separate books?

I will definitely not buy two books. My sister requested to read the book first. But. I am a faster reader. I can read at night without sleeping. I don't have tuition. She wants to finish it before school starts on Monday. I have all the time I have in the world. Hmm? So how leh?

Thursday, July 14, 2005

About the Number 3

got it off Rozie's blog...

3 names you go by:
- joan
- jal
- ping

3 screen names you have had
- jal4eva
- jal5eva (this is after my jal4eva fiasco)
- ahjiao

3 physical things you like about yourself
- my hair
- my body
- my legs

3 physical things you don't like about yourself
- my tummy
- my pimples
- my dandruff

3 parts of your heritage
(I don't really understand what does this mean, I don't agree with what Rozie interpreted it as so I'd be saying)
- Singaporean
- elements of Hokkien
- elements of Cantonese

3 things that scare you
- fear
- loss
- pain

3 of your everyday essentials
- air
- water
- heart

3 things you are wearing right now
- clothes
- charm
- contacts

3 of your favourite bands or musical artists
- Wang Fei
- Wubai and China Blue
- Linkin Park (a lately thingie)

3 of your favourite songs
(I'm going to put down my current favourite songs)
- 小城大事 or 大城大事
- In the End
- 第二天堂

3 things you want in a relationship
- honesty
- security
- love

2 truths and 1 lie (in no particular order)
(while we are at the number 3)
- I have 3 immediate family members
- I have 3 living grandparents
- I have 3 boyfriends

3 physical things about the preferred sex that appeal to you
- 1.82m or 6 ft 0
- broad shoulders
- age (is age physical?)

3 of your favourite hobbies
- watching something
- reading
- stoning

3 things you want to do really badly now
- scream at my sister for playing the piano
- kill TT Durai and burn all his money
- send my xxoos to someone

3 careers you are considering/have considered
- air stewardess
- movie director
- hotel PR

3 places you want to go on vacation
- Prague
- St Petersburg
- Europa Park again

3 kids name you like
- James
- Jadies
- Javies

3 things you want to do before you die
- have kids
- make a movie
- meet Bismarck's descendents

3 ways you are stereotypically a boy
(note the use of BOY)
- I like watching football
- I have short attention span
- I am a lazy dirty pig

3 ways you are stereotypically a girl
- I can cry, at will
- I'm emotional
- I obey

3 male celeb crushes
- WUBAI I so had wanted to marry him lor... Why had he married that other woman?!! I don't care, I can still screw him on day. For goodness sake, his wife is 42 lor, he'd be better off with a sweet young thing like me~ wahaha~
- Owen Wilson the blond hair blue eyed
- Miroslav Klose the 6 feet German

3 people that I'd like to see take the quiz now
- do I look as if I care?!!

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Retail Therapy of Hats

I never owned a hat save for my Dunman High cap that was part of my uniform back in secondary school. During the fisherman's hat craze some years back, I too borrowed a black fisherman's hat to wear once in a while, but the craze never really grew on me. This was because I don't have a head to wear hats.

I have a small head. I could pass of for a palm sized head if my shoulders weren't broad from my years of swimming. Having a small head would mean that when wearing hats, and covering up my hair, my head would look smaller. If you realised I don't usually tie my hair up, yup, cos tying my hair up would also emphasise on the small-sizing of my little head. I prefer to let my hair down, covering my broad shoulders and framing my small face trying to add volume to my head.

But something changed me.

I bought a World Cup 2006 cap in Germany. Okay, I didn't buy only one, cos I bought it for friends too, so I actually bought a couple, and I'm wearing one of them now. Not now as in the present moment as I'm typing this blog, but now as in recently and will be. The cap is big for my head, but it's something really convenient. During my rough patch, I had taken to wearing that cap around to cover my red and swollen eyes and to prevent people from recognising me. Okay, it's not like people can't tell it's Joan from looking at her hair, but still, you do get my idea don't you?

Now, Joan is walking out of my rough patch, and trying to pick up the broken pieces again. One easy way to walk out of a rough patch, is retail therapy. Not really retail therapy as in buying things, but as in spending money. I also have been buying lots of useless stuff too though. It's therapetic seeing the money flowing out of my hands, numbing me from other pains. Over the past couple of days I went watched two movies, sang ktv, and bought useless stuff like paper and notebooks which I still have yet opened up the wrapper, a whole range of body shop products, and my lastest aquisitions, a hat and a cap.

Counting in my sister's pink OP cap, I now have 3 caps and a hat.
I've like this sudden fettish for caps and hats...

This afternoon I was having lunch with Huijing at Siglap. Side track a bit... It's so great meeting up with Huijing again, so must share the pics with everyone~ One thing I like about Cartel, their lightings. Nice warm orange glow which someone told me always makes people look nicer. So, taking pictures would not need flashlights which would render the face an uneven pale shade with tinges of oil visible.

Here is one of Joan's famous self taken shots, with Huijing of course

This one is courtesy of this VJ guy opposite our table. He does have not bad photography skills, I must say. And I think he noticed that my camera was set to no flash mode so he double checked with me was it that I had not wanted flash
This is in high resolution mode, a good 1.65mb, but it's well worth it!

Anyway, back to my main point. After the lunch I felt this urge to buy more hats, so I got Huijing to accompany me down to Parkway for some light therapy. And I bought two pieces of material that could be used to cover up my head neatly.

This Adidas cap...
joan in adidas white with red details cap

And this cute beret from Xcessories...
joan in dusty pink beret

Nice haul for the day...

Seriously thinking, if this phase continues I can build up on my hat fettish and maybe one day I can have a hat collection comparable to my bag collection. (I have 40 bags if you don't know) I think the only person who would freak out would be my mum. She was the mum who seen her daughter bought a new pink handbag before leaving for Germany and came bag with three Nici bags, albeit one was for her sister, but there is no doubt that she would also carry it. So now, that poor mother will have to cope with that same daughter bring back hats at a rate of two a day? hehe~

Why this sudden fettish?
I think it has something to do with my rough patch. Hence the caps. The other hats are probably my way of hiding my head in shame, no thanks to my rough patch.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

My Rough Patch

I think by now most people should have heard that I'm going through a very rough patch. At least everybody who hangs out online long enough to hear my grouses should have heard by now my whole story worthy of a Hong Kong drama serial, 40 episodes no less. And I'd like to give a tribute to all these people.

A big thank you to all who stood by me. Even though I won't take any of your advices. I'm sorry.

For those who have yet heard of my problem, I do not wish to publicly announce it to the whole wide world, after all, it is a disgrace of mine. Whatever choice I choose, I'd like to reiterate that I did so under calm thought and calculated deciding.

I've grown older under this immense pressure about my rough patch. And I also found out a couple of things about myself that on a normal day I would not go think about. Although I still have not found my way out of this rough patch, I'm slowly but surely walking out of this shadow.

1. One thing I realised about myself is that my conscious mind is much stronger than I thought.
I can really control how much I want to think about or not about my rough patch, but that is only when I'm conscious.

2. My subconscious mind is also much stronger than I thought, but in a negative sense.
All my pent up thoughts that my strong conscious mind blocks me from think will come back to haunt me via my subconscious mind when I'm sleeping. Through dreams and late night thoughts, I find myself not being able to sleep and not being able to sleep well. Usually if I don't want to dream, I can prevent myself from dreaming, but lately I've been dreaming a lot, and these dreams wake me up, in tears. This morning, the dream even made me type out an sms, but luckily I did not send it. I was aware that I was typing it but I didn't know what made me do it. the words of my sms didn't make sense when i put them together, but somehow I think it meant something.

3. Coke can act as an anti-depressant.
When I was in Germany, I had troubles having a good sleep, I'd wake up in the middle of the night, that was when I started drinking coke to make me sleep better. Also I started drinking coke in the morning to get the depressing thoughts out of my head. Now, it's that all over again. I'd drink coke before I sleep and drink coke when I wake up to cleanse myself from all negative thoughts. It works pretty well. Like that night I woke up with a huge craving for coke, after that I managed to sleep better. Coke is addictive too. Just like anti-depressants are addictive.

4. The best thing to do when someone shares a problem with you is to listen.
Dont give solutions cos there is no way you can give a perfect solution cos there can be no perfect solution. I heard many different ways people share my problems. I like the kind when they listen and emphatise with my but not pity me. I like it when people share with me their stories in retrospect. But I don't like it when people say, "You should do this" or "You should do that" or worse "why can't you do this". And I further hate it when people think that their solution can solve all my problems and I should listen to them. Sorry, it's not working.

5. Occupying myself by doing other things.
Going out. Stuffing myself with Chinese Drama stuff. Numbing myself.
I'd like to thank that faithful friend who gave in to my tantrums and brought me out to lessen my pain. Thank you for the K-session, the movie, all the accompaniment and listening to my whining and bearing my tantrums. I know I'm not an easy person to deal with, so, really thank you very much. I'll repay you by following your wishes and spend more time working on my script. I won't disappoint you!

6. Mood affects my eating habits and my gastric problem.
After that fateful day when my problems started, I went on a 48 hour hunger strike. Not really so much of a strike, but maybe a fasting. To cleanse myself from all sins that might trigger my retribution. Then I started eating again, but I couldn't eat much. Then I was feeling nauseous very often too. I can feel nauseous at any time of the day before during after meals. I don't know if it's my mood or my eating habits or maybe both. I'd have to do something about it. My mum said that I'm losing weight again. The last time my weight fell freefall was when I was stressed with Temasek Nite, with all sort of other stuff coming up, I've no wish to lose any weight at this point in time.

7. I throw unnecessary tantrums at people.
It becomes like a prolonged pms, just without the cramps and bleeding. I'd feel damn frustrated, but later regret my actions.

Cant think of anymore. Not really a good thing to think of more anyway.

For the individual thanks.
- thank my parents for accommodating my nonsense
- thank the person accompanying me here and there cos I didn't feel like going home
- thank my friends for hearing me go on and on about how pathetic I am yet having to bear the burnt of my snaps
- thank the person who reduced me to this state cos it's better that i'm reduced to this state now than later
- thank the person who never fails to crack me up
- thank all who have provided me aid

I will become better.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005


I was only away for one month, and much have changed in Singapore. I never thought one month would make such a great difference, but this one month really made a big difference in my life. In the month I was away, chocking changes were made, and these almost made me despair into devastation. If only I was here to experience the change, perhaps the news would fall on me less hard. SBS Transit, oh man~

This afternoon I decided to take a stroll from my house down to Siglap, or maybe Marine Parade Road. When I started walking, I haven't made a decision. I let my legs do the decision. As I was walking walking walking this bus drove by me. Bus number 48.


For a moment I was stunned. My first thought was that it was a non-servicing bus. But then again, non-servicing buses usually do not have numbers on them, so I peered into the windows of the moving vehicle. And I saw passengers! I was like what's that?! So I hurried to the nearest bus stop along that stretch of road to check the bus services. I saw this...


There's a new bus along the road! In a nice bolder white print than the other bus services. But of course, my most immediate concern was where was this new bus plying. If this bus was going to ply some uluated road, who cares man, so I checked out the sandwich board hanging on the bus post.


Okay, I made this bigger so that you can see the words. The words which got me so excited. This bus was a bus that would bring me to Parkway! My favourite hangout, Parkway Parade. I even had devoted one blog entry to that coolest shopping mall.
I was even quoted by Straits Times as they did a follow up to the said article the next week. Yup, other than putting up my grouses online, I sent a carbon copy down to their editor's desk. Yes, I do love Parkway that much.

But it wasn't only the Parkway thingie that got my spirits up, it was the bus plying through Bugis Junction and Holland V that made me stop for a double look. I'm not really a Bugis fan, but my sis is, and being the nice sister I am, yup, I was excited for her. I haven't been that much into Holland V, but well, I am an NUS student and other than Fong Seng, there aren't that many places that are popular for suppering, Holland V is one of them.

But before I go on praising SBS Transit for doing such a good job in linking my home to Parkway, this other sandwich board caught my sight...


I also made this big cos I am indignant!

I was only gone for a month and I came back to Singapore to see this?! Okay, I admit, public transport in Singapore is cheaper than in Freiburg, but on concession, Freiburg's definitely cheaper. For 30euros I got a regioKarte which allowed me to use any mode of transportation within the Freiburg region, which is a rather large region anyway. In Singapore, a bus stamp would cost me S$48(that's the price I know, not sure if it's inceased anot). BUT, it does not include MRT rides. If you want train concession, that would be an additional S$52. And it's not unlimited rides, it's capped at 4 rides a day. So for a combi concession, I think it costs S$98, with a S$2 discount. AND THE TRAIN RIDES ARE CAPPED!

Why am I complaining? Cos I'm not a concession holder and I frequently take long bus rides to school or to some weird weird place, my bus fares were usually S$1.53 which I thought was pretty decent cos it's capped at the max, BUT it is now S$1.55. I know it's only 2 bloody cents but it's still a lot to me. Imagine me taking to and fro everyday, that'd make it 4 bloody cents and multiply that by 365, that'll be S$14.60. And Singapore has a population of 2 million commuters according to that billboard advert

Conclusion: SBS Transit are big bloody bloodsuckers. And they ARE already making profits.

Hai... Maybe this is a small price to pay for to get that straight bus to my beloved Parkway.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Chronicles of a Girl in Freiburg

I'm back in Singapore, and looking back on my trip in Germany. Time flew by fast, just like that, a month has gone by. But during that month, it seemed like time was passing by slowly. I don't know how would my SEP be like, then it would be for 4 months. 4 months away from home would be a lot different.

It isn't very much of family that I missed. I have a quote, by me, "Blood is thicker than water, but water quenches thirst." I know that I can leave home for one month, one year, or even one decade, and when I return, my family would still welcome me with open arms and give me hugs and kisses without hesitation. But I can't get this sort of security from others. Only from my family. Maybe it because I'm a skeptic, I think that friendships cannot withstand the test of time. Then again, my friend gave me a quote yesterday, "You can be a skeptic, and not get any." Maybe I' too skeptical. If only I can open my heart wide enough to accept things easily, maybe I'd be happier.

But still, this trip to Germany was indeed an eye opening one. Below, I attach a report I did for the university there about my trip, and those in this colour are my added comments. I mean, after all, we can't be exactly honest when doing these things up for the people who paid for most of my trip there, right? I'd have to be politically correct sometimes. hehe~

Report of Freiburg
Joan Ang

Stepping out of the aeroplane at Frankfurt am Main Airport, breathing in my first wisps of German air, I was suddenly overwhelmed by this wave of apprehension. I knew not of what was lying ahead of me for the next four weeks in Freiburg. However, greeting me at the Freiburg Hauptbahnhof were friendly faces of my host and the other host family taking part in this programme. Immediately, all my feelings of apprehension vanished, what was left were feelings of excitement. This excitement was more than adequate to sustain me for the next four weeks of my stay in Germany.
>>Yes, the excitement did lasted me for 4 weeks, but it was a difficult 4 weeks. I had to occupy myself day and night to keep my mind from wandering off. I too started having regular sleeping hours of 11-7 to prevent myself from falling into and emotional dire.

I was arranged to stay with Maike Röhm in the little village of Au. That was actually not my original posting. My original posting was to a family with a cat, an animal that I have problems getting along with so I had to swap families with another student from this programme. Luckily, there was someone willing to swap with me. Also, according to the posting information, my host family was supposed to have a rabbit which I have not seen throughout my four weeks of stay. Maike has three daughters whom I was living with, and another grandmother, Martha, who was the mother of a friend of Maike’s. The family members are all very accommodating to me not being able to speak very well German. Maike started out speaking with me mostly in English and only until I was used to the place that she spoke more German with me. I think this was very thoughtful of her as I was able to feel more at ease and less of a culture shock while learning more German at the same time. Even the children were very accommodating with me. The middle daughter, Lea usually speaks very quickly and not very proper German tried to speak very slowly with me, sometimes even pausing after each word to make sure that that word was registered in me.
>>The family was great. Just that they had their own activities planned and I found it hard to adapt into their lives. Maybe they found it hard to adapt me into their lives too.

The next day, we were supposed to meet Dennis and Carolin to go to the Mensa before touring the town area. It was the first time I ventured out into the town and I was all by myself in a totally foreign area. I took the bus there. According to Maike, there are two buses which ply our village to the town, but I was only given the bus schedule of one bus. However, I was still able to make do with the bus schedule pasted in the bus stop as my house to the bus stop was not really a very far distance, so I was always able to run out to check bus timings. I find that the bus schedules here are very accurate and I was always able to rely on them even though they are not very frequent, and even less on weekends, but I was able to get by with it so it was not really much of a problem.

The tour around the town area orientated us well to the town. The town is really beautiful and its architecture is something that cannot be replicated in Singapore. We were brought to almost every creek and corner of the town area and we were almost fully oriented for living in the town for the next four weeks to come. The meeting of the other host families that came after the tour of the town was very interesting. My host, however, was unfortunate not to be able to make it to the little gathering, but the other hosts also mingled around with me and the other students in this immersion programme other than their own hosted student. The gathering also provided me the opportunity to chat with the other NUS students on the exchange programme here in Freiburg and get to know more about options in doing my exchange programme. They also provided me an insight in studying in Freiburg after being here studying for quite some time already.
>>I think it is great that I managed to have some contact with some of my friends' hosts, like Najib's hosts, Clarence's too, and some others.

The next day was the start of our German lessons. Our teacher, Susanne is really a patient and good teacher. She speaks very slowly so that all of us can catch what she said and very often repeating what she said a few more times for us to fully understand her. Her lessons were conducted almost completely in German which I think I really a good idea as that would better train us in the language instead of always relying on translations to get by. Also, even though the standard of German between the students in this immersion is rather varied, Susanne always made considerations for the class as a whole and made sure that her message was got through to everyone, especially the weaker students. Susanne also did not put any student on the spot when asking questions and very often either picked someone who knew the answer to answer questions or guided the student to arrive at the answer without making the student feel lesser than the others. I really appreciated that move by Susanne as I was not a very quick student in picking up the rationales behind what was taught.

After lessons was a group lunch with Carolin and Dennis. The Mensa was something new to me. Even the food in the Mensa was something I never seen before. Perhaps it was only the second day I was in Germany and I was still feeling a little out of place, but I thought that the food I had had in the Mensa was not really that nice, but as I ate more in the Mensa, the food started tasting nicer, so maybe it was because of me getting more used to it. Dennis and Calrolin were both very patient as they slowly explained to all of us the workings of the Mensa and helped me with the operation of the vending machine and the Pfand Machine which I had trouble using.
>>Food in the Mensa was not worth its price. One meal costs about 3euros, and the food isn't exactly that nice. I could get better food outside by just paying a bit more.

On Sunday, Dennis brought us to Heidelberg. I think Heidelberg is a very beautiful town and the visit to the Schloss enhanced our knowledge of German history. The visit around the town was also very fun, the only disappointing thing was that we had not had enough time to finish exploring the whole town area even though we were at Heidelberg for the whole day. Dennis is a fast walker and sometimes he tend to forget that girls cannot walk as fast as him, so it was a little tiring and hard to catch up.
>>I liked Heidelberg.

The excursion to Schlossberg in comparison to that with Heidelberg turned out more to be a fiasco due to the heavy downpour. Even though the view from atop the Schlossberg was really beautiful, I did not think that the long hike up in the rain was worth it. Maybe the rain made everyone wet and cold, hence that feeling of tiredness. Perhaps if there was a wet weather plan, we could have more enjoyed the scenic view from Schlossberg on a nice cool and dry day.
>>But I didn't like Schlossberg. I thought that Schlossberg was a waste of time. Maybe the rain just dampened my spirits.

Tuesday was our first tutorial with Carolin. Tutorials with Carolin are fun and interesting. Carolin uses a lot of sound effect to make clear what she wants to say as she knows that with our basic knowledge of German we wont be able to fully understand her message, and like Susanne, she knows that speaking to us primarily in German would be more effective in getting us to learn the language. Tutorials were also very fun as each week Carolin would play with us vocabulary games helping us to learn more words and speak more German even within the immersion students. All of us were so used to speaking to each other in English.

The theatre trip the next day was an eye opening experience and the first test to us of our command of the German language. It is unfortunate though for me to say that I had not managed to catch about half of what was going on. The parts that I was able to catch were all parts that were more physical and it was only through the aid of the gestures that I was able to comprehend their lines. Still it was a fun trip as we were able to see how theatre in Germany was like. Even though I really liked the drama, I think that maybe a simpler play would be better for students like me with not a very strong grasp of the language as of yet.

The trip to the TV station was also rather fun as the person directing us about the tour of the station was very friendly and accommodating. He allowed us to touch and play with all the equipment and the set. Even though I think that all TV stations are about the same despite its location, the trip was still a fruitful one in terms of us having a chance to practise our German as we were treated to a live broadcast of something like a news bulletin. The whole broadcast was in German and as it was a broadcast, it was clear and easier for us to understand what it was about. The newsreader was amazing in that she was able to read quite a lot of lines from memory without a teleprompter or anything similar. Even though she had cue cards, she had not once paused to look at them.
>>We stopped by the Mercedes showroom before going to the TV station. Oh man... After seeing cars on the street and seeing all my dream cars, I'm starting to think that perhaps a BMW645Ci isn't really my kind of car, rather a Mercedes CLK230 would be more suited for me.

One of the most fun excursions I thought was the one to Titisee. We were able to take a paddle boat ride out around the lake which was realy very beautiful and scenic. We also had the chance to taste authentic blackforest cake. We were also able to do a little shopping and touring of the little town there, but if we had more time there we would be able to tour the Schwarzwald and look at more shops in the area. Some boys did manage a short trip up into the Schwarzwald but most others were not able to go up due to time constraints.
>>I think most of you reading my blog would know that I don't eat cake. But in Germany, I broke my not eating cake rule and ate cake cos the cake in Germany is really different from what you can get anywhere around here. Also, I'm not a chocolate or ice cream person, yet in Germany, I started eating that almost every day. I'm a fan of Portofino's Eis. I think that is one thing that I'll really miss now that I'm back home. I also started drinking coke on a regular basis. Maybe it's because I was slightly depressed. I started drinking coke during the last examination period to cure my slight depression and I think coke helped me miss home less.

I though that the excursion to Colmar was a little odd as Colmar was in France and there we were not able to practise our German. Carolin brought us on the trip there and there were some hitches in us getting the bus ticket and we ended up having to pay for our visit into the museum in Colmar. I found that the museum trip in Colmar was a little too long and as the time dragged there can be only that amount of things for us to see. Still, this is only my own view as not everybody had the time to finish viewing the museum again due to time constraints. Maybe it is because that we are quite a big group of people that we had wasted quite a lot of time waiting. I am not sure what time was the trip to Colmar supposed to end but because somebody in our group had to leave early most of the others ended up returning early with her. Only me and two other students wanted to stay on and see more of Colmar, hence we had to do it on our own. Even though Carolin also stayed on in Colmar, she only did so as we wanted to stay and I think that it was really nice of her to stay on as she could had just made us all go back early.
>>Shopping in Colmar was fantastic. I love shopping~

The visit to the Badischen Zeitung was at the last minute changed to a game of minigolf. I think that the visit to the Badischen Zeitung would give us a better opportunity of practising our German as most of our host families too do read the Badischen Zeitung regularly. Although the minigolf was also quite fun, but it was also a little funny of us trying to hit balls into holes. Also for such a big group of people trying to play this game of minigolf together was also quite a waste of time. Still, we had fun ribbing each other of our lack of accuracy in our hitting of the minigolf balls.
>>Minigolf was dumb, but we did have great fun jibing each other. I think it was the company that I enjoyed and not the game. And I realised one thing, I can ram balls and not hot the ball. I get impatient very quickly and when I get impatient, I'd keep ramming the ball and hope that out of 100 times I ram the ball, finally one would get the ball in. Persistant. Zuan nui jiao jian. I'm a bull ramming my horns into a corner of a wall and even though I know I can do no damange, I still ram myself hard and do damage to myself. That's me.

Even though my German is still not very good after 14 days of being in Germany, I really liked the visit to the cinema and the choice of film we saw. Usually I watch foreign films with subtitling but as my German improved and the actions of the characters I was soon brought into the film and forgot about subtitling and other mundane matters. I was really touched me the film. Still there were some parts that were a bit awkward as everyone else in the cinema except for us were laughing, and we just sat there asking each other what had happened. Luckily, after the film, Carolin patiently cleared our questions and doubt about the parts we did not understand.
>>Bärfuß. I liked the story. If only life is but a story and I can meet my man who can stay devoted to me for the rest of our lives, life would be so much easier. And I like that lead acter who doubled up as the director and producer and dunno-what. He's masculine looking because of his double chin. Okay, to some people it's called a split chin or cleved chin or whatsoever, but I'm calling it a double chin. I like it.

The excursion to Breisach and Staufen both did not come at the right time as the weather in that few days was terribly hot. My host asked me why was I feeling that uncomfortable with the heat when Singapore was hotter than this, my answer was that there is a lack of air-conditioning here. I cannot say air-conditioning is better, but that is what we are used to so it was hard to fully enjoy ourselves in the scenic towns of Breisach and Staufen when we were feeling very uncomfortable with the weather. The weather also ended up with us all in the cafes at both towns. Still I think that it is also a fun experience to sit in a cafe with the rest of the students on this trip and attempt to practise our German as we made our orders.
>>I hate the heat. Put me in a hot place without airconditioning and it's not a beach, I'll bite you.

Finally, the last excursion was to a Kneipe, but unfortunately, most of us ended up getting apple juices in a beer garden so we could not really feel what it was like to drink German beer and chill out in a German beer garden.
>>I did drink a bit here and there from others. It's okay, beer is beer. I'm more of a cocktail person, be it alcoholic or non-alcoholic although I usually take them non-alcoholic. According to some people, girls who drink cocktails are supposed to be more difficult to deal with. I don't know. It sounds quite true.

I think what the university can do to help us understand this place is only very limited and the true exploration was to be done either on our own or with our host family. I think I am quite lucky that together with a few of the other students on this trip, we went to Europa Park where we truly had fun and also learned more about European culture which was really helpful in my field of studies. It was also in Freiburg where I managed to get a German book, the memoirs of Bismarck, that I found would be very helpful to my studies and which I cannot get it back in Singapore. Also my host brought me to a swimming pool and a small lake to see and experience for myself how people here have their summer.
>>Europa Park is great. I wanna go back there for my honeymoon. And I wanna go to Legoland. I didn't manage to go to Legoland, so the next time I'm back in Germany, I want to visit Legoland. The swimming pool and lake were pretty interesting. Especially the lake. I mean, there are naked people running around and making out and nobody cared that I was taking photos, although I wasn't taking them, they weren't afraid that I might accidentally take a photo of them or whatsoever. And they let their kids run about naked too.

I can safely say that this trip to Freiburg was really a big eye opener to me and make me want to immediately return to do my exchange programme. In all, time really flies by very quickly and four weeks have past. Even as I am typing this report I am starting to miss Freiburg.
>>Well, home is still home.

Still, it was great to have been through living in a foreign place almost on your own. I wandered the streets of Freiburg on the first weekend alone before meeting some of my friends around. And sometime, I too needed time to myself, and that would call for me wandering the streets again. And that I easily got lost, so I spent doubly more time alone in the streets. On my last day, I also spent a good amount of time running about Frankfurt Airport on my own trying to get my tax refund. The song "I'm a big big girl in a big big world, it's not a big big thing if you leave me..." kept recurring in my head. Maybe I was just consoling myself.

Am I a big girl now?
Would you prefer a big girl instead?

Friday, July 01, 2005

shopaholic let lost in the streets of freiburg

This is a list of stuff Joan bought during her one month stay in Freiburg. This list doesn't include any necessities and are all purely a result of her hard core shopping.

Joan started out her hard core shopping in Colmar, France where she bought a red dress from Cache Cache. That set Joan back by €22,90, paid for in cash. Then in the same day, Joan got some small gifts for friends from Sephora, shall not disclose the amount I spent cos later zou read my blog then you know how much I spent on you, I'll feel awkward.

Then 13 June, Joan bought Bismarck's memoirs, think most of the people here who read my blog would know this already, so I shall not elaborate, just a mentioned that I charged €24,90 to my Masters because of that.

When Joan was in Europa Park, Joan also did a little gift shopping there, buzing Mercedes car models. Not disclosing the price, cos that will make me feel awkward again. And speaking of Mercedes, I got a letter from them thanking me for my participation in their competition, in short, I didn't win it. I got Mercedes caps from them which I was pretty disgusted about and my dad was quick to want make claim for it, but I said no matter how ugly the cap is, it was still my effort that make me want to like the cap.

On 24 June, I went to Galeria Kaufhof and bought a Germany tricolour national tank top for €30. I shall wear that and go for football matches even if I have to watch them on screen.

25 June, Joan and Deborah went absolutely wild with shopping. But Joan cannot be beaten, after all Deborah was going to Paris and she can do more shopping there, but for Freiburg, Joan really showed Deborah how to spend money.
foot wraps and toe socks from Galeria Kaufhof
World Cup miracle scarf from the same place
two pairs of Birkenstocks from a shoe shop, one was the normal one strap kind, pink in colour, for €24,90. the other was a pair of white covered toes, with a back strap, leather, that was more expensive, €68,90, but compare that you cannot get it here, I think it is pretty worthwhile.
a World Cup pullover, €25 from Karstadt Sports
several World Cup pins, as gifts
a Nici pink dolphin handbag, for my sister, even though I think I might be using it more often than her, from Karstadt
last purchase on that day, a Zippo lighter for my Ah Gong, engraved with a Schwarzwald mädchen.

And if you were thinking that day of shopping could put Joan to rest, then you are so very wrong. The next day, Joan went back to town by herself and got the following stuff.
5 packets of 1kg gummibears, but one packet got lost in transit. WTF...
several big gummibears as gifts. I have given one to my sister and she was drooling over it, she came to me and said she heard the gummibear calling out to her to eat it.
a Nici Lillebi bag for myself
a Nici Lillebi towel for my mum
a Nici Lillebi coin purse for my maternal grandma
a Nici jelly bag on sale, €8 only, so for Joan, it was a must buy
a World Cup something for Jinwei cos his birthday is in July. Why did I say a something? Cos I havent told him what I got for him. hehe...
some German grammar books for myself to practise

And that was not all, the next day, I bought 3 Nici Lillebi hair accessories for me and my sis. Yup... that was Joan let loose in Freiburg.

Altogether, Joan spent €163,90 in cash and €237 charged to her Masters, which makes that a grand total of €400,90. Considering that this amount does not include food and stuff, Joan grand total of spending in Germany, and Colmar came close to S$1000. BUT that is within my budget, so I am fine peeps. I guess. And I am happy, so who cares.

Let's see, on food, Portofino Eis and Würst from the Münsterplatz, Nordsee, Potatoland, yup, I should be coming close to €500 in all, although I think I have yet exceeded my budget. I shall wait for my Masters statement to come in before I say anything more ba... Till then, help me cross your fingers.

a PS: my suitcase weighed 47.5kg. Yes, it was that bad, and I threw alway like everything before coming back.