Friday, June 30, 2006

Detective Conan on Youtube

I'm addicted. I've spent the whole of today wasted on Detective Conan. I was supposed to do my readings, bathe, prepare an essay outline, and in the end, all not done. I'm screwed. I watched almost all episodes of Detective Conan online, the movies, the OVAs, and what nots. Previously, I only watch the English subs, but I'm now taking into watching the Chinese subs, so far so good. But very time wasting. I'm screwed.

To be very honest, I'm a leecher. I watch all episodes anonymously. I take the trouble to sign out then watch all the videos, I don't know why I do that either, probably to cover my tracks. I don't comment and I don't rate videos. Neither do I flag them or do anything to them. I'm a silent leecher.

Recently, quite a number of users have had their accounts suspended resulting in a subsequent decrease in videos. Sucks~ But I'm a leecher, so I can't say anything about it. Anyway, I don't think I'd upload anything online, I'm too scared of the copyrighting laws even though I leech. bah~

Anyway, I'm trying to do up an AMV cum fanfic right now, but I can't seem to get the scenes I want. That video in youtube doesn't play finish, I don't know why. I've been trying to get it to play for two days but it hasn't been able to. I need to try again tomorrow, hopefully I will have better luck then. Also hopefully experience will make me a better AMV maker. The clips I have now are already of much better quality than before, so at least I know in one aspect I have already improved.

Some pet peeves when watching videos on Youtube. I know I don't have a right to be peeved since I'm a leecher, but this is my blog anyway, it serves as a platform for me to rant, and I will do just so.

I want to watchs subs!!!

This doesn't apply to Detective Conan, but too Tsubasa Chronicles and xxxholic which are ongoing projects with multiple uploaders and every single episode has been uploaded. I prefer the widescreen versions.

Some people can upload an episode in full, some need to divide them into parts of each less than ten minutes. I used to watch the full episodes in preference to the parts version, but recently, I think I prefer the parts one. It's faster to upload and when it hangs and I need to refresh it, I won't waste that much time going through the earlier parts.

Private videos.
If you want to share your videos, bloody hell just share them. If you don't want to share, don't share. I don't see a point of people putting them up as private videos and make people be their friend just so that they can view the videos.

I also hate it when I'm forced to comment. Comments should be freewilling, so is rating and stuff.

People's Comments.
It's stupid to read comments like "Thaaaaaaanks!!!", "Coooooool!!!". Okay, it's not that bad compared to comments like "Yay! I'm the first to comment!", like duh~ Although I'm a leecher, it still makes me cringe as much as those uploaders to hear comments like "Can you upload episode xxx?", "When are you going to upload part x?", or worse "I want to watch xxx anime, upload that can?" Those are really stupid irritating leechers. Yes, I leech, but I don't go to the extent. We are leechers and are at the mercy of those who uploads, that doesn't give us any right to demand anything. I like discussions about the contents of the show though~

I hate it when the video stalls and I need to refresh. I need a more stable internet connection. Can't wait to go home so that I can spend hours on youtube with any interference.

People who only watch animes on Youtube.
And have no idea of what's going on in the missing episodes. They'd as in the comments what happened and why. Bloody hell. It just sounds so stupid. Examples, "That guy just called him Kudo? When did he know about it?", "Who's that girl? Is she also shrunked like Conan?" If they don't know they really shouldn't be watching the videos.

Youtube's search list.
There is no systematic ranking of the videos that comes out of Youtube's video search. And there's no way I can to filter out the disgusting AMVs. Youtube needs a better search engine, and a proper system so that I can go directly to the page I want to go to, or a longer list of search results. bah~

Video's descriptions.
Please at least describe the videos so that we can have a brief idea of what to expect and to gauge if we've watched that before.

I seem to prefer the people doing up Tsubasa Chronicles and xxxholic, I think their median age is definitely a lot higher than the people doing up Detective Conan. There are like five different people doing up the entire series and some other people doing up different episodes of the two series. And they always put them up as immediately as possible, in high quality, and I get to choose to watch some of those in widescreen, where people won't look thinner than they are.

But then again, Detective Conan is a very old series and it's still running and the subbing people are well, I don't know where they are. But anyway, I'm a leecher, I can't complain.

Seriously, I think I need a life, a life that doesn't involve sitting at a computer the whole day and do nothing except watching videos online. Maybe I should work on my that AMV now. Even without the clips I want, I think I can still come up with something. Or maybe I should go and bathe. Or maybe I should do my readings. And don't have to remind me, I should also be putting up my travel logs and uploading photos to my the other travel journal/photo album. And I also need to upload my pictures from Herzogenaurach to my computer. And I need to show those balls to you before you see them on TV!!! Those are the highlights from my trip. You need to see them on my blog before you see them anywhere else.

I'm so screwed. I'm such a procrastinator, and youtube's really not helping much at all. bah~

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Tired + Sian + Procrastination + Godknowswhat

I've just got back from Herzogenaurach, no, correction, I've been back for about 23hours already, but I still have not uploaded the photos from my camera to my computer much less upload them online. Now thinking back, I also have not blogged about Singen, so I guess I won't be blogging about Herzogenaurach in the immediate near future. I'm so sian, and I don't know why.

I've lost my drive for blogging.
I've lost my drive to do up photos.
I've lost my drive to do work.

If you have noticed from my MSN messages I've been putting up, I've lost my drive even to talk. Out of ten messages, I think I only reply to two or three, sometimes when I'm in a good mood. And I usually don't talk for long either. I was just checking my chat logs, it's already the 29 of the month, yet my biggest log file stands only at 265kb small. When I was back in Singapore, my log files were like at least 1mb big by the end of the month. And the funny thing is that the people I chat with more frequently now are not my more conventional close friends.

Gabriel who stands at 265kb is someone I've only met twice. Andreas at 199kb is someone I've never met. Andrew who comes in third with 167kb for the month of June is another guy I've never met. Funny that they are all guys. Shit is next with 133kb of messages. Jinwei comes up at 5th position with 114kb. Now it seems even funny that the top five people I chat with are all male. Granted, I think these are the only handle of people I bother relying messages to, so it's no wonder that they have large long files. I think I don't bother to talk to people I haven't talked to in a long while, and bother even less to talk to them for long, so it turns out that I the ones with bigger log files will see their log files get bigger.

Today, I spoke to a grand total of two people online. Not surprisingly they are the top two in my log files. I think I'm suffering from "Newton's First Law". Someone once used that term, I like it a lot~ hehehe...

Anyway, really sorry to those people I've been ignoring, I'm not actually been ignoring you, it's just that I feel tired. Not really interested in making constructive comments about anything, and I'm too tired trying to explain to people how I'm feeling. yea... Maybe that's why I've only been talking to those same few people, because they know that I'm not dead yet, and there's nothing interesting to talk about about my life.

I woke up today with a very bad backache and leg cramps. More about that when I finally get to writing my travel logs. But for now, it's watching Youtube for me and making an AMV. And need to get some work done. Then maybe I'll go to Stuttgart, but only to the Mercedes-Benz Museum, maybe to the Porsche Museum, then I don't know what already.

yea... And I won't be blogging anything decent soon too. Maybe craps, but nothing much. My brain not working already...

Monday, June 26, 2006

Want Anything?

I'll be going down to Herzogenaurach tomorrow early morning. What's there? The headquarters of two of the biggest sportswear makers in the world. adidas and Puma. And of course, I'd definitely be visiting the adidas factory outlet, not so sure if I'd make it to the museum. If there's time, I'd drop by the Puma side to see too.

So, if anyone wants anything from there, SMS me IMMEDIATELY. Those who know my Singapore number, SMS me there, those who don't SMS me at +49 0162 1529454. But don't sadle me with too many things, only those you really want, and it's too expensive in Singapore, or not even sold in Singapore.

I'd be going tomorrow, so catch me before I leave there. And more importantly, DO NOT CALL ME. I can't afford to pick up calls, unless you call my German number, bah~ lol~

Okay, that's it, bye!

Stupid Sundays

This is just to stupid for me to give it a pass.

"about me


jus in search of a ger who beieves in "love can move a mountain"
im a simple guy who gives no too hood bout my hair my dressing.. i believe ppl shld love each other for them self.. i believe in giving my love everything i can., her wish wld b my command i wld ans all her wishes, if she jus asked mi too but if she denied mi one of her kisses. dont noe wat ill do!!

i wld hold her close . say 3 words wisper into her ear i treasure her n ill dance on the beach till the sun set.. tgt hand in hand w her making love on the beach



the gate keeper of the heart

favourite quote


love can move a mountain

general interests


Outdoor Activities
Playing Music
Food Exploring

specific interests


falling in love , stayin in love, listening to lyrics of sad old lonely love songs

who i want to meet


any one who wld share my believe the "love can move a mountain"

favourite food


no need for food, love will keep us alive"

Found it wholivesnearyou. This guy posted a stupid question about love can move mountain in the forum. At first I thought this guy would be some guy nursing a broken heart or something, so I clicked on his name to view his profile page. After reading I burst out laughing. This is a a big hua chi lor~ Even bigger than a normal hua chi girl. Either he is so deprived/repressed/naively romantic, or he is just pathetic. By the way, he's 22. That makes it even more pathetic to think about it. So old liao still so naive. hai...

I was just sharing a couple of thoughts with Cindy. About love and sex and fuck buddies, well, I hope I'm not trying to disillusion people with my thoughts, and I really hope people can really find their true love. It's just that I know I'll never find mine.

Somebody once said "a cynic will never get it". I don't know which is the chicken which is the egg, all I know is that now, both the chicken and the egg form a complete cycle.

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Nice Dinners

I've been cooking a lot. It's so funny because I never needed to cook back in Singapore. It's not that I don't know how to cook because I do know, it's just that there wasn't a need for me to cook. My mother cooks for the family, she doesn't work, so there's no reason for me to cook. Even if there is, I don't have the time to cook as I still need to go to school, and I always wake up late. When there's no one at home and I'm starving, there's always 62353535 or 67773777 to call. The two nights before I left Singapore, saw me calling both numbers in succession.

Now that I don't have such a luxury here, I have to cook.

Most of the time, my food turned out to be somewhat edible, but also through repeated cooking, I've better my food over time. Remember this post? I first tried out cooking marcaroni and cheese, but well, it was edible but not fantastic. After some other tries, I finally realised the crux of marcaroni and cheese.

This is another marcaroni and cheese dated 13 June 2006.

The trick is to melt the cheese, then pour the marcaroni into the pot of cheese and mix it, then the cheese would be evenly spread out among the marcaroni and lessen the effect of getting sick of too much cheese or that some marcaroni tasting tasteless. If you noticed in my earlier version of marcaroni and cheese, I merely spread the cheese over the marcaroni, hence some parts have too much cheese and some parts not enough cheese. I'm now madly in love with marcaroni and cheese and able to eat finish all without feeling sick of the cheese~

However, there are still times when I cooked pathetic stuff. Once I tried making omlette, but because I turned on the wrong stove, my egg couldn't cooked. In an attempt to cook my egg, I stirred it. Then I realised that the wrong stove was turned on. By the time I got the correct stove to be warm, my omlette turned into scrambled eggs due to my over excessive stirring of the egg. Also something was wrong with the mix of ingredients I added into the omlette and while eating the food, I noticed a pool of water being strained under the eggs. Disgusting. Even after draining the water, I still couldn't bear to eat any more.

Another pained experience is with this pasta. I used spiral pasta which I already have not much a liking for (don't ask me why I bought it, please) and I wasn't sure how long it would take to boil. In the end the pasta turned out to be not well cooked. Not only that, the tomato sauce itself was totally wrong. Number one, I turned off the stove and forgot to turn it back on again, so it couldn't boil. Number two, I accidentally poured in the water from the canned mushrooms, god knows what additives were in that disgusting pot of water. Number three, I added the wrong kind of ham and it turned out not suited for this tomato sauce. I ate no more than a third of it before finally throwing away.

If you've notice, I never cooked meat before. I don't know how to marinate meat, I don't know what I should use to marinate meat. I'm also not very confident of my little frying pan whether it is suitable to cook meat. But well, I needed meat if not I'd die. I'm such a big meat eater.

Turn back the clock to my Benelux days. I know I have yet put anything up, but just to let you guys preview the travel log first, I'll say a little bit about it. I bunked in with Gabriel and he cooked for me on one of the nights. Actually it was my last dinner in Benelux, after that I had to leave on the night train back. Well, I found out that cooking meat is actually not very difficult.

gabriel's pork
Basically he just marinated it with olive oil and some Italian herbs and put it on a pan to fry.

Of course, him being a pathetic guy (contrary to all the food posts he has put up), he, after cooking his slab of meat, put in in the mircrowave to make sure it was thoroughly cooked. Oh well... ... men~ And of course, Joan Ang can do it better! Although, granted, he food was edible, not that bad, although the mash potato could be better, but maybe it's just my taste.

Deciding that I can cook, and having a leftover bottle of wine with me, I decided to buy some meat to cook~ The wine was brought, incidentally also by Gabriel when he bunked in with me. Some guy on his train gave it to him. bah~ My gift to him when I bunked in was so much cooler lor~ wahahaha~ Anyway, just to be safe, I bought the cheapest kind of meat, and the simplest looking kind. Little did I know that my decision led to two most wonderful home cooked meals I had in a very long time. Even my mother can't beat that.

The First Dinner~

1. The meat, marinated in olive oil, light soy sauce, salt, Italian krauter (not so sure what it is in English), and the wine.
2. Instant noodles, I need my carbos. My housemate commented that my noodles don't look cooked, but it was on purpose, I prefer my noodles to be firm and hard, and the past few times I cooked instant noodles it turned out to be too limp and soft for my liking.
3. Frying the meat, with an egg. Actually I had wanted the egg to be cooked sunny sided on top of the slabs of meat, but the egg fell off the meat and onto the pan, so it turned out to be, well, normal sunny-sides.
4. The noodles on the plate.
5. The noodles and the meat and the egg all set on the plate waiting to be served.

The final serving, together with iced peach tea.

I bought iced peach tea because I needed something sweet and quench thirsting that is not Coke or Pepsi, I think I've too much cola intake already. The whole serving turned out to be fantastic. The noodles were filling and just nice and tangy for me. The meat smelled good and was firm and tasty, the egg was well, as all eggs are. I added some dark soy sauce to complete the egg and it added some flavour to the noodles and a bit of the meat. The overall effect was fabulous. Much much much better than I had imagined. And of course the iced peach tea, I think Coke wouldn't be that complementary in that serving.

If I thought that was great, little did I know that better would come just the very next day.

I had five slabs of pork, but as you can see I only served two in the first dinner. When I was cooking the five slabs of meat, my housemate commented that I indeed was very hungry. Of course, I hadn't the intention of eating all five, not even Joan can do that. I said I was only eating two, perhaps three, the rest would be for the next day. My housemates are well, pretty envious of me that I can eat so much and not grow fat. Of course, they don't know that I am already growing fat from all my eating. It's just they hadn't see me when I was thinner.

Granted, I'm still pretty proud of my figure, even with all the extra kilos I've put on, they don't seem that much obvious on me, yet. The day I went grocery shopping marked yet another time I was picked up by some weird guy. It'd be nice to be picked up by some somewhat decent looking guys, but well, sad to say, I'm not a magnet for nice guys. bah~

The next day, I microwaved my leftover pork to mark the end of a good day.

I think it's the arrival of summer, that I can bring out the nicer clothes from under my suitcase and wear them. The dress I wore earned me three praises from three different people. All of them said the same thing, "Your dress is very nice!" *head swelling* Of course a dress would only look good on someone who can carry it off.

It's actually a very simple beige overall dress from CK Jeans.
beige ck jeans dress

The dress, and that people saying that it is very nice, will only state one point, fashion is not about keeping up with times and changing your wardrobe every season, fashion is about style that is evergreen. This dress goes back to at least seven years ago. No kidding, seven. I still remember it was bought with my aunt using maternal grandmother's money. At that time I was still young, probably sec one or two. That dress was going at a big discount. And of course, at that time I was still a sub-40kg (yes, I was damn damn damn skinny at that time, so I never thought that I'm now skinny) girl.

At that time, because I was still young and conservative, and that I was skinny and the dress was big for me, I wore it over a shirt. If you look closely at the material, it's sort of like an overall, so I wore is as an overall. And also because I was young and conservative, so that dress was too revealing, so must wear something inside. But as my weight soared, I never wore that dress again after secondary three, all the way until JC. After I started losing weight in the middle of JC two, and got back to a sub-50kg figure. My whole weight gain and loss history can be read here, so stop all ignorant comments if you don't know anything. I started wearing the dress back again after I graduated from JC. Leaving the school uniforms and shedding weight suddenly saw me without many clothes to wear, so I dug up the clothes from way long ago, before I grew fat, and this dress was one of them.

Of course, no longer a young and conservative girl, and no longer thin enough to wear that dress with a shirt inside, I wore it like how I wear it now, just the dress itself~ That dress and weathered through time and fashion, and also through me growing fat and thin and it's has after like so long of me owning it finally becoming a staple of my wardrobe. Especially that it's from CK Jeans. Anyway, this dress only proves to people that I'm not a trend following girl, changing my wardrobe every season. I only buy clothes which I can wear for a very very long time. hmm... This might even count as one of my oldest piece of clothing which is not a hand me down. Funny to some people, I actually do own quite a bit of hand me downs, handed down from my aunts.

Some of my hand me downs that I wear so frequently that it has become so Joan includes my pair of jeans, the one which I sometimes wear to school, although very seldom. I've not grown too fat for that pair of jeans already, so I don't expect you guys to see me in it anymore. And the red Burberry dress I always wear. That's a hand me down, and a very old dress. But nobody seems to know that, that dress has become so me, and also thus people labelling me as a brand conscious girl, because I wear Burberry. tsk tsk.

I've realised that I've yet again successfully went so off tangent. damn... I've to go back to my dinner now!

Because I'm known among my housemates as the most unhealthy person, I decided to buy something healthy to eat for a change. My housemates have come to realised that this (to them) thin girl does not eat salad or fruits, and drinks Coke like water, eats fast food and high carbo food every meal, and likes meat a lot. Every meal I eat don't have any vegetables, if I cook them. The only vegetables I eat are from sandwiches or burgers that I buy from outside. Only sometimes do I buy spargels (asparagus, in English), but haven't bought them lately. Anyway, I had a craving for cherry tomatoes after one of my housemates was eating it. I thought it'd be nice to add them in my pasta, especially with tamato sauce, but I've given up eating pasta with tomato sauce after having one very bad experience I mentioned further up.

I had the nicest dinner, and the healthiest meal for a very long time~

1. Fresh cherry tomatoes.
2. Boiled cherry tomatoes.
3. Marcaroni in a pot. Have I said I'm totally in love with marcaroni?
4. Straining marcaroni.
5. Melting cheese.
6. Melted cheese with marcaroni. Have I said I'm totally in love with marcaroni and cheese?
7. Marcaroni and cheese served with cherry tomatoes.
8. Leftover pork from the story above, sent to the microwave.
9. Served with iced peach tea yet again

A nice and healthy and wholesome meal~

I've bought more meat, chicken this time to cook tomorrow, and I will make my current favourite marcaroni and cheese again~

To celebrate my ability in cooking, and also that I'll be buying a great dea of local produce back home, I'll be holding a little tea party session on the first weekend of August. I'll be cooking maybe some wine marinated pork/chicken, depending on what I'm able to buy, asparagus fried and boiled, fried with the famed Schwarzwalder schinken and egg and some other stuff, boiled served with sauce hollandiase, and my favourite marcaroni and cheese.

I've invited four people, but only two have confirmed their attendance with me. But I haven't told my parents about this yet. So cross fingers~ Now thinking about the other two who have declined, I think if I tell one of them that the other is going, he might just agree to go just to see the other person. hmm... But then I'd need the other to go first. bah~ Anyway, it's not that I really want them to go, I headache so much for them for what? I go look for my other friends~

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Countdown Meme

10 Favourites
Favourite colour: Red
Fav food: Seafood
Fav song: Faye Wong's 《扑火》
Fav movie: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Fav sport: (I do) Swimming, (I watch) Football
Fav season: Autumn
Fav day of the week: Friday
Fav ice-cream flavour: (if there is) Mango, (more conventionally) Chocolate
Fav book: (Chinese) Liang Yusheng's 《萍踪侠影录》, (English) Patricia Le Roy's Angels of Russia
Fav cartoon: (anime) Tsubasa Chronicles

9 currents:
current mood: Excited. (I've bought my ticket to Herzogenaurach!!!)
current song: Rihanna's Unfaithful
current book: Donna Leon's Blood from a Stone
current subject studying: Second Industrial Revolution
current thought: What shall I buy in Herzogenaurach?
current time: 1858
current toenail colour: Half pink for the big toes, the rest all came off already
current boyfriend: None
current wish: I want to go to Stuttgart, Mercedes-Benz Museum after my adidas Museum trip~

8 Firsts:
1st best friends: A girl named Clara (or something sounding similar) from Kindergarden
1st crush: I think by now everybody should know who he was. And I still mention about him now and then, he looks like Van Der Sar. wahahaha~
1st movie: Beauty and the Beast? Aladdin? Whichever came out first...
1st piercing: Ears
1st handphone: Nokia 6110
1st sport: Swimming
1st pet: None, my dad did have fishes before, but I don't count them.

Last cigarette: None
Last drink: Coke
Last car ride: With my friend and her landlady to Baden-Baden. Oh man... It's so long since I've been in a car, and to think in Singapore, I sat in cars like every day.
Last crush: If not counting the fucked up guy, since I don't see him as a crush, then maybe hehehe...
Last movie seen: MI:3 in German
Last phone call: The guy from my insurance agency calling to ask me if my address was wrong because my mail bounced back, but the address was correct, and he had to send it again, and yes, I finally received my insurance card, like I so need it since I'll be leaving soon. duh~
Last sms: Lorenz, something about our referat.
Last song played: Rihanna's Unfaithful

6Have you evers:
Dated one of ur best friends: I wouldn't call it a date.
Broken the law: I brought underage girls to watch R21 movies, and go drinking. Wait, I watched RA movies in cinemas before I was of age.
Been arrested: No, but I was once stopped by Policemen. It was a school day at about 9am, I was in my uniform, and I was in an uluated area of East Coast Park with a friend trying to walk to Suntec City. Mr Policemen asked us why we weren't in school. lol~
Skinny-dipped: Nope
Been on TV: Some interviews for some events, yes, a few times before, but all very brief.
Kissed someone u din noe: Nope

5 things you are wearing:
- My Calvin Klein beige dress
- My black Chaos long pants, damnit, the weather's turning cold AGAIN!
- My pink Birks
- Bra
- Panties (nothing more to write already)

4 things I've done today:
- "Made" a referat
- Watched the Ukraine-Tunisia match
- Bought my train ticket to Herzogenaurach
- Chatted online

3 things I can hear rite now:
- Cars honking, must be the Spanish
- Housemates talking
- Some loudspeaker, some MC is talking, must be in preparation for the France-Togo match, or the Korea-Switz match

2 things u cant live without:
- Food
- Love

Things u do when ur bored:
- Use my computer, I can blog, read blogs, surf news, YOUTUBE!!!, and read and do so many many things online, offline I can do my photoshop and AMVs

As usual, not tagging anyone since I wasn't tagged to do this, so do if you feel bored, or if you feel like it. lol~

Friday, June 23, 2006

Love and Sex

I just had this conversation with a male friend of mine.

Friend says:
The girls I've really liked

Friend says:
I didn't think about ****ing them

Friend says:

Me says:
then who do u think of when u think of sex?

Friend says:
Because after awhile I felt guilty of such thoughts

Friend says:
Girls I don't emotionally care about

Me says:

Me says:
i dont understand men at all...

Me says:
i dont understand how man can separate love with sex

Friend says:
Hai of course would be great to make love to the person you love

Friend says:
But hot girls who are sexually attractive, the body can't help it

Me says:
then why can't love those sexually attractive girls?

Friend says:
Because love is based on other stuff other than hotness

Friend says:
Guys can go to prostitutes but don't need to love them

Friend says:
Because in a sense it's not the person we want, but the body

Me says:
how can men separate themselves from their body?

Friend says:
Because the brain can exist without hormones

Friend says:
Hormones just influence the brain

Friend says:
Anyway you won't understand unless you're a guy

Friend says:
Sex is just sex.

Friend says:
Don't have to be emotionally involved

Friend says:
Plants can fertilise without feelings

Friend says:
So can men

Actually, I should have known all these long long ago. He was the one who instilled all these into me to prevent me from getting too carried away, but of course, I got carried away. Even after going through bad times, and surviving all of the shit, I thought things might be better for me. But of course, things will never get better because of some inherent composition. I don't understand. I can never understand. Doushite? Doushite? DOUSHITE???

Maybe I do understand but I don't want to understand. I don't want myself to be hurt any more.

After that conversation, I changed my MSN message.
all those things i did because of love are the same as all those things you did because you never loved...
Suddenly I regret my decision from this...

It funny that I actually teared. I can actually tear during an MSN conversation... lol~ I feel so disappointed with myself. Maybe I can blame my dinner... I put too much wine into my pork, but then, I still think it's the events of yesterday, and a wrong decision made.

Memorable Quotes from Brokeback Mountain

Jack Twist: Tell you what. The truth is... sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it.

Jack Twist: ... You are too much for me Ennis, you sonofawhoreson bitch! I wish I knew how to quit you.
Ennis Del Mar: [crying] Well, why don't you? Why don't you just let me be? It's because of you that I'm like this! I ain't got nothing... I ain't nowhere... Get the fuck off me! I can't stand being like this no more, Jack.

Jack Twist: There ain't never enough time, never enough...

Ennis Del Mar: Bottom line is... we're around each other an'... this thing, it grabs hold of us again... at the wrong place... at the wrong time... and we're dead.

Cassie Cartwright: [on the verge of tears] I don't get you, Ennis del Mar.
Ennis del Mar: I'm sorry.
[he pauses]
Ennis del Mar: Was probably no fun anyway, was I?
Cassie Cartwright: [crying] Ennis, girls don't fall in love with fun!

Oh well... At least both Jack and Ennis were guys who really loved each other. At least...

I Have A Referat Tomorrow

I'm so nervous... Speaking English to a bunch of Germans and not sure whether they understand me, sounds quite bad sia...

Our topic and discussion questions

Die wirtschaftliche Entwicklung: Boom und Niedergang?

1. An welchen Sektoren der Wirtschaft kann man einen Aufschwung ausmachen und welche Verschiebungen gab es?

2. Mit welchen Problemen hatte die Wirtschaft in Großbritannien ab den 1880er Jahren zu kämpfen und wozu führten diese?

3. Inwieweit ist der Verlust der herausragenden wirtschaftlichen Stellung Großbritanniens den Unternehmern und Industriellen anzulasten?

4. Wo liegen die Gemeinsamkeiten und Unterschieden zwischen den Argumenten von Weiner und Rubenstein?

5. Kann man von einem Niedergang der Britischen Wirtschaft auch in Hinblick auf die Entwicklung in den USA und Deutschland sprechen?

My part

Wo liegen die Gemeinsamheiten und die Unterschieden zwischen den Argumenten von Weiner und Rubenstein?

- both agreed that economic decline was relative
- cultural factor affecting the British economy

- the cultural factor
o Weiner
 decline was due to cultural reasons
• the failure of social and mental structure of Victorian Great Britain
• the failure of entrepreneurs
• snobbery
o Rubenstein
 economic decline was not due to cultural reasons but economic reasons arising from cultural factors
• spending on old technology
• overseas British investment
• Men of Substance becoming rentiers
• family firm ethos instead of corporate structuring
• old boy network

Other reasons for comparative British economic decline
- comparison with the United States of America and Germany
o incredible economic growth of the latter two countries
 USA recovering from the Civil War
 unification of Germany
 Britain unable to respond
• growth slowed
o technical schools
 British education system placed greater emphasis on the classics rather than vocational training
o labour factor
 America lacked skilled labour, hence the need of technological development
 Britain had an abundance of skilled labour, hence the continued usage
o American entrepreneurship and inventions
o new industries of scale
 British unable to keep up with these changes
- British investment overseas
o did not need to rely on economic growth at home
- British free trade overseas
- did not need to rely on domestic agriculture
- management failure
o failure to keep up with modern developments
o mistaken investment strategies
- rise of protectionism with the onset of the First World War

Kann man von einem Niedergang der britischen Wirtschaft sprechen?
- If decline was relative, yes, but if decline is measured by absolute terms, no.
o relative decline
 American and German economies have surpassed that of the British
 but „British economy was still far stronger in absolute terms than 50 years earlier“

I will be needing to fix up my speech a bit more and hopefully things will go all right~

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

The Two Sides of a Golden Coin

yes or no?
- Can't there be something between yeses and nos?

black or white?
- Can't there be a varying tone of grey?

forget or remember?
- Can I not forget but don't remember?

I once made a decision that I tried very hard sticking to it, but that time period that I drew up is coming to an end. What lies in store for me 46 days later? I really do not know, and I don't want to know. I want to be happy, but happiness can be derived from two opposing things, or should I say, sadness will come from these same two opposing things.

I have something that I've been guarding very tightly. I have from long always been in danger of losing it, but somehow or another, I've found a way to get around things without losing this. But is there any good for me to keep holding onto this?

I think I've been running away. Running away from making a decision.

Or maybe I need to find another form of support, to give me a valid reason not to face all those dreaded decision, or to force to to make another form of decision, but then again, can I keep myself to another form of commitment?

It's times like this I really hate myself. Or can I safely say that I wish I'd never met you?

Now playing this song over and over again...

I feel like her...

Tuesday, June 20, 2006


Some eons back, I went with my Taiwanese friend to Konstanz. The Konstanz trip was actually her idea, she wanted to visit the Bodensee and the little villages around it. Since I had the time, and wanted to visit other places too, I went with her. Sad to say, this isn't one of my more pleasant trips. It also made me more appreciative of myself when I went on the Benelux trip alone. Company might be good, but wrong company can be a pain in the ass. Granted, my friend is a great person and everything, just not compatible to me.

My sister asked me, why don't I have many pictures of myself in my photos, it's so unlike the Joan we all know. Usually I don't have people to take photos for me, and when I do, I'm quite shy to ask them. It's like not very nice to impose on people, especially people you don't know very well. hai... It's times like this when I miss my personal photog so much. I must I must I must find a girl for him and repay him back in kind for all the trouble.

The trip to Konstanz included two transits. I hate transits. But well, after my Benelux trip, transits are no problem for me, but that's another story altogether, I'll dictate the story when the time comes. On two of the trains, I met this Hong Kong family. The parents were about in their late 30s to early 40s, the son about 10 years old. At first the family were conversing in Cantonese, then somewhere in between, the mother started interrogating the son in British-crisp English. The son haltingly answered in grammatically and politically English answers to the questions. I then realised that the mother was making her son practise for a school enrollment interview.

This brought me back to a Hong Kong drama I once watched a very long time ago. There's this parent who wanted to enrol the kid into this prestigious school, and brough the child to the interview, not before a series of practising. But one of the questions from the interview was not scripted, rather than fumble, the child answered the questions from his own thinking, and displayed his child-like innocence. The principal was impressed by the child's answer. If I were an examiner, I'd hate those politically correct answers that sound scripted. This is an interview for the child, not for the parents to stage their homecoming drama. In a way, I do pity that child, for his parents' expectations weighed heavily on his little shoulders.

Some people say Singaporean parents are kiasu, but I think Hong Kong parents are even more competitive, and they all have that metality of wanting to win. From some little exchanges I had with the mother, I found out that she too was from a boarding school in England when she was young, that explains the accent, and the perfect English. The father spoke no English, maybe it isn't as good as the mother's, or perhaps, he just doesn't speak English. From the nuggets of information, I think I can conclude that they should be a quite well off family, or at least the mother is from a well off family. After all, boarding schools don't come in cheap

But for education, all parents are willing to spend.

Finally, we reached Konstanz~

It took us like half a day to decide on taking the Rundfahrt on a boat. Correction, it did not take US half a day, it took SOMEONE half a day. One thing about Joan is that she has extremely short attention span, and if she wants to do something, chop chop she'd do it. Many of the time I need to tell her to decide on what she wants to do. If I decide, she'd come up with half a dozen arguments to question my decision, so I gave up deciding. Besides, I'm fine with anything, so as long as it's not something major, I'd go along with it. If it were something major, I'd wouldn't even have let her go into her second round of deciding.

This is how she decides something. Look at it, this one round, and ask me for opinion which I won't give because it's just so ridiculous. Continue stare it at for about another ten minutes until I ask her the second time, what's her decision. She'd then think about it for the second time wasting about another ten minutes. Then after about 15 min more she'd walk off saying forget it. Repeat this process in every restaurant we go to except that she'd finally make an order which she'd regret when the food arrives.

Enough of my complains, i don't really want to get started in the middle here. So, on the boat, we enjoyed the sceneries of the Bodensee.

Just enjoy the sceneries, I'm not going to describe them, there's nothing much to describe anyway unless you want me to say things like, this is a church, this is a clock tower, these are railway tracks. kauz...

Actually I was very tired on the boat journey and almost dozed off after I'm done with taking photos. The weather was nice and windy with a bit of sun, and with enough clothes on me, it felt really great to just lie in the middle of the lake and sleep. Okay, I did not have adequate sleep the night before because I had to get up hell early in the morning to catch the train. But once I'm started with the camera, I'm all energetic once again. Speaking of the boat and sun, I really don't understand why some girls hate getting tan. Especially those of the far Eastern Asia. You see a whole lot of Japanese and Korea whitening products and the Taiwanese so dig into them. I like to be tanned, and I think most of my girl friends share the same thoughts with me.

Wile taking photos somewhere around in Konstanz, this weird guy approached me. At first I thought he wanted me to help him take a photo of him, but he actually wanted to take a photo with me. He was so interestingly dressed that I thought it'd be well, interesting, to take the picture.

weird guy
he looks like he's killing me. lol~ Maybe the beer's getting into his sytem.

After the tour of the sea, we went to the city centre itself and just took pictures of the towns and everything. Konstanz is interesting. Konstanz is one of the very few European cities not to have been affected by the World Wars of the 20th century. Because of it's proximity to Switzerland, and Swiss neutrality to the wars, few dared to bomb Konstanz for fear of stray bombs landing in Swiss territories and alluring the Swiss into the war.

There is this one thing that Joan likes, is to take pictures of water, and fountains, and stuff... And innocent little children...

children playing water
Seeing those kids, I realised that I'm old.

Whenever I see kids playing with pigeons, running around a Platz filled with pigeons and attempt to catch them, I thought of the times when I was still a kid. I relished feeding pigeons, and always wanted to catch them, or just run into them and watch them flutter around. That was when I was still living in England, and touring Europe at like three years old. The pigeons in Singapore are absolutely digusting, because they mostly congregate under HDB blocks near the rubbish cutes, and they shit everywhere. yucks...

Speaking of under HDB blocks,
"I just threw a durian seed out of the window!
I've been throwing lychee and durian seeds out. Hope that they will all grow into tall, sturdy, fruit-bearing trees in a couple of years! :D
Pretty trees. :D"
- written by some prominent blogger
This is why I have a phobia of walking under HDB blocks. I really have no idea what those people in HDB are thinking, inconsideracy is at a new high, together with ignorance and naivity. Now all those crazy young HDB living girls will do the same, I shall vow never to walk under HDB flats when I go back to Singapore. NEVER.

Anyway, back to the pigeons, I still hate them now even though they are no longer under HDB blocks, but in the big open Platzes like when I was still 3 years old. Seeing children frolicking with pigeons now make me wonder if those children will get like sinus problems or god-forbid bird flu. And I stare hard at the ground to see how much shit those pigeons have shitted. And worse, I get a depraved kind of excitement when I see pigeons like this.

This is taken by Gabriel, but spotted by me. I don't know why I didn't take a picture of it, perhaps it was because I didn't want to stand in the middle of the road and look like a fool.

In Konstanz, I finally ate my first strands of spaghetti after leaving Singapore. think the last strands of spaghetti were with Cindy at Liquid Kitchen, the Seafood Pasta one... I like seafood pasta~ I want to go to Pastamania, or Cafe Cartel, or even back to Liquid Kitchen, but oh well...

Although not seafood, but it's still prawns~

Maybe I shall go opposite later tonight to buy pasta, or lagsana, or even pizza. Yesterday's dinner was terrible. I asked my housemate what I should eat, she said lagsana, but of course I didn't have ingredients. I saw the menu for the restaurant opposite my hostel, but finally decided that I'd cook pasta, not spaghetti though, the spiral ones, don't know what they're called. I don't know why, but it turned out totally horrible, almost inedible. Something when wrong with the pasta, and also the sauce was weird, and the ham was out of place. hai...

Back to Konstanz, I'm almost done already, bear with me a little bit more. I've taken a liking of taking pictures of flowers here in Europe. Especially when all the flowers are so beautiful and colourful. And that I've mastered the art of using the macro function of my camera, pictures of flowers taken close up looks just so beautiful. One day, I want to compile all my nice pictures of flowers and make a postcard collection or calander or just a photography album~

gardenpink flowers

With that, let's say goodbye to Konstanz~

Note, I've used lesser animated gifs and lesser crappy descriptions, but because of the pictures, the length of the post seems longer. I hope those people not happy with my animated gifs being too fast for you will like this post better. But then again, there's nothing much to be said about Konstanz that sleepy little town anyway. We spent like one day and one night in Konstanz that we got so bored of it that we wanted to go and watch a movie, but as you know how she makes her decisions, we didn't watch it in the end. lol~

I shall now go and fiz up on the other travel logs. And maybe upload more photos up into my travel journal photo album. I'll put the link up maybe at the end of my whole trip, then you can save the trouble of going back there to check for updates every now and them.

Monday, June 19, 2006

National Football Teams

The FIFA World Cup 2006 Blog Entry

But before we go into details, I'd like to show you guys something...
double joan in berlin 1200px

hehehe~ Digital imaging.
Finally my skills of photoshopping have reached a new high~
This picture is made using a composition of two pictures. Although a mirror is involved, the light was not adequate enough to brighten up my mirrored face. I had to use photoshop to brighten up my mirrored face but it turned out that after brightening the picture, my real face turned too bright. This composite is made using a not too bright real face together with the brightened up mirrored face. And I did some editing to smoothen out the edges. Not bad right? hehehe~
*proud of myself*
(try work out the hidden message if you have nothing better to do)

Back to my post proper. Too much crap will scare my readers away.

Most people would know Joan is a footbal fan, and those who know Joan is a football fan would know that Joan is a big big Chelsea fan. But still some people, people from the opposite gender as Joan, are surprised by how much Joan knows about the football industry and the transfers and other kinds of useless news. Yes, Joan keeps up to date with footballing news because she has nothing better to do other than surfing pages and pages of football news online. And I'm up to date not only with news from the English Premier League, but also of the other football leagues too, well, the other European football leagues, at least. I know nothing about the football leagues of the other continents, except maybe a few of the bigger Brazilian and Argentine clubs.

So, all these should point to a Joan feeling very excited about the World Cup, right? But sad to say, after watching about a third of all matches played, I still don't feel that hyped up. I'm sort of supporting the German and English national teams, but I don't really hate any other team, except maybe the Brazilians. The kind of love and hatred I have for national teams is not as extreme as the love and hatred I have for club football. Maybe this is why I'm not feeling the heat of things as yet.

Why do I feel a greater affinity with club football than national football? With club football, we see the players play every week from August to April/May, and with the League Cups, and Champions League, we more often than not see them playing twice a week, for nine to ten months. Hence, of course I'd feel more for my club team, especially that I've been supporting them for five years already. National teams don't play that often. And there are only one major National competition every two years, the Euros and the World Cup.

And also another thing is that as a Singaporean, I don't have a national allegience to pledge to. You can argue that I don't have a regional allegience to pledge to Chelsea, but club football has long transcended regional lines. Sad to say, there are only about 3 Londoners in Chelsea's main team, John Terry, Frank Lampard, and Joe Cole, luckily they are considered to be the first team players, so at least 3/11 of the Chelsea team do go along regional lines. Some other teams (note: ARSEnal), don't even have like English players in starting eleven, much less to say Londoners. Okay, they have Sol Campbell, but how much football is he playing since he's like always injured or sick?

Maybe if I were European I'd feel more of an affinity to the national teams. Maybe I can love them more and hate them more. My housemates hate certain national teams because of some international rivalry which I can't write here because it may sound a bit seditious, but well, that I'm a Singaporean, and transcending all these international rivalries, I don't really hate or love teams as much as I hate or love certain football clubs. And without that love/hate factor, watching football is not as exciting when you don't have a particular team you'd wish to see win or lose.

Take for example the FA Cup finals and the Champions League finals. Even though my Chelsea was not playing, and I don't like any of the teams, I was still excited, mainly because I want a certain team to lose, because I just hate them so much. between West Ham United and Liverpool, I'd just needed to support the underdogs because kanasai Liverpool kicked us out. Between Barcelona and Arsenal, this was a very interesting match because I hate hate hate both teams, but I hated Arsenal a little bit more than Barcelona, and that was enough for me to support Barcelona. This sort of intensity I feel towards club teams cannot be mirrored with the national teams.

Even if Singapore plays in the World Cup, which I think won't be in my lifetime, nor might it even be ever possible, I don't think I'd support them. For one, I don't even know any local player. For two, are the local players even local players? Most of them, the majority are like bought players from other nations, although they hold a Singapore passport but I don't feel that they feel like a Singaporean. Other countries may also have national players not borned in their countries, notable Deco, a Brazilian borned, now turned Portuguese, Alex, another Brazilian borned, now playing for the Japanese team, even big names like Zidane aren't even borned in the land they are playing for now. take the German national team, the two first choice strikers Klose and Podolski are both Polish borned. But their whole team does not consist of these foreigners. And neither are these foreigners paid to play for their adopted countries.

Deco decided to play for Portugal because there was just too many good players in the Brazilian team and he'd have trouble making to the national team. But the Brazilian coach recently revealled that if Deco was still Brazilian, he'd have called him up. Alex, might have been paid, this I'm not very sure, but at least Alex is playing in the J-League currently and has a wide fan base. Zidane moved to Marceille when he was young, so he can still be considered as French, not to mention that Algeria was a French colony, so it doesn't really make much of a difference. I'm not so sure about Podolski, but I know Klose was courted by the Polish coach to join the Polish national team but he declined. All these are not about money, but about nationalism and pride, and what they feel to be. This is something Singapore can never achieve in footballing terms.

Without having a reason to support national football teams, why am I still watching the World Cup? Number one, to make all of you guys back in Singapore freaking jealous of me. wahaha~ ALL matches are telecasted free on national television, and I really mean ALL. From what I've heard from friends back at home, SCV's really been cutting you poor people's throat back at home. It's okay if you need to subscribe to SCV to watch the World Cup, but to make existing subscribers subscribe to another channel for the World Cup is atrocious. Can't they just broadcast the matches on ESPN or something? Isn't that what ESPN is for?

Another reason I'm watching is to support individual players.

This is something very unlike what the normal Joan would say. The normal joan would go on and on about football being a team sport and no individual player is bigger than the team, blah blah... But well, I can't help it now that I don't have a specific team to support.

On a very personal, and club centred agenda, I'm hoping all Chelsea players would outshine all the other players, so much so that I'm even supporting players like Drogba whom I detest the most in Chelsea. So I follow very closely to things like the Man of the Match, and individual statistics. I want Chelsea players to be the Man of the Match, and of course to win the Golden Shoe, of course, I'd also be very happy if Miroslav Klose wins it. Right now we have five Man of the Match won by Chelsea players with Arjen Robben winning it twice, and of course my dear Miroslav Klose has also won it once. Hernan Crespo has also two goals in his pocket, same as Klose, so that's all for personal glory. And also club glory, since I can boast that Crespo is from Chelsea, so is Robben, Lampard, Makelele, Eisen (even though I don't really like him).

Another reason, I sadly have to admit, that I'm after all still a girl at heart, and shuai ges will always attract me. And there's no other place where I can see a whole lot of shuai ges on the same screen. And also because it's football, the shuai ges will also start to show tendencies of yaoi, something that always never fails to interest Joan.

The hugs.

The kisses.

The gropings.

The orgies.

hehehe~ yaoi at its best...

Distancing the football players from their club teams, and me not being biased towards them, I've found a couple of shuai ges. I'm judging them mostly based on looks, so unless I mention about their football skills, take it that I'm not really impressed by their footballing abilities. Good footballers I'll talk later, shuai ges come first~

Keiji Tamada, Japan
He's damn cute!!! I first saw him in an international match perhaps two years ago, and went google him up, but couldn't find much information about him. He's now in the World Cup squad but mostly a substitute player. I think he's cute, but I don't know how well he plays though. Maybe after retiring from football he can go act in some J-drama, sure can beat Takuya flat~ wahaha... And this is coming from a Takuya fan... lol~

Tim Borowski, Germany
A mostly used as a substitute player. Damn... Why are the shuai ges all subs? Maybe it's because they've only have looks and not skills... lol~ He plays in Ballack's position when Ballack's not playing. I first noticed him about two years ago playing for Werder Bremen, the club Miroslav Klose is playing for, hence why I'd go and notice that club. lol~ Borowski is tall and handsome, with those blond floppy hair and blue eyes... swoon~

Lee Chun Soo, South Korea
I first saw him four years ago in Korea when he was a substitute player. Now older and more matured, but I don't think his skills improved much, he's still a hotheaded guy with more angst than talent. But he's cute~ hehehe~ Sort of have a boyish charm in him, I like~ hehehe...

Iker Casillas, Spain
This isn't the first time I'm swooning over Casillas, if you search my blog for Casillas, I'm sure you'd get a couple of results of me mentioning Casillas. I just love him, he's so shuai. He's also a good keeper, but sadly I haven't got to see much of him in action yet. In the statistics, he'd made only two saves, against Ukraine which Spain won 4-0. lol~ But I'll watch out more of him in the next couple of matches~

Hidetoshi Nakata, Japan
I never thought he was shuai even though I've seen him around for the past four years, but I don't know why I thought he looked shuai in tonight's match. I always though his eyes were too small, his hair dyed until too showy, but he looked so stoic and enigmatic tonight that I felt so captivated by him. hmm... Maybe it's because he was playing well... lol~

There are some players who played well and are also damn shuai~

Okay, this picture just doesn't do justice to him.
Jan Koller, Czech
He's damn tall, even taller than Peter Crouch at 202cm. He's big, something Crouch is not. Crouch is tall and scrawny, like a beanpole, but Koller is big, as in really BIG, he's porportionately tall and big, like a giant like that. His header of a goal was like perfect. Too bad he got injured. hai... And when he was injured, the Czechs weren't playing as well.

David Beckham, England
The most overrated player on earth. But is he really overrated? I always thought he was, but when I watch the other national teams play, I came to realised that what I always took for granted is not widespread across all players. I thought that long balls ways got to their intended recepients. I always thought corners were for crossing the balls to get headers into the goal, but apparently, not all players are gifted with this ability to cross balls. I'm really starting to appreciate Beckham even more now that I'm seeing really atrocious long balls and corners that aren;t crosses. Out of the three England goals, two were from Beckham's setpieces. I must really appreciate him more. Oh, and he looks really good with short hair, doesn't he?

Kaka, Brazil
He's young, he's cute, he plays ball well. With one goal to his name, and one Man of the Match, and one World Cup title, although he only played one game in that World Cup, he's still achieved lots. And he's damn cute. Another guy with boyish charm.

Edwin van der Sar, Netherlands
He looks like someone I know (someone I once liked), that face... I didn't notice it for so many years of watching the EPL, until now, I saw his face, I thought of well, the past, and noticed that shape and that kind of figure, though the said person is much shorter than van der Sar, I mean, of course isn't it, everybody is shorter than van der Sar, except Koller. lol~ Man Utd did make a good buy in van der Sar.

The best for the last. The most shuai person on the fields of Germany, even more shuai than any of my favourite players. And also the most talented player on the fields of Germany, except maybe for a small handful of other elite players.
Pavel Nedved, Czech
Oh my God, he's so damn shuai~ wahahaha~~~ I've noticed him three years ago, or maybe four, he's so shuai~ Those long blond locks of his and clear blue blue eyes and that chiselled face, nice and clear, like a porcelain doll~ I love him~ My housemate was saying that usually porcelain dolls were of women or children, why would I use it to describe a guy, a footballer especially. Well, he looks like a girl, not really, a boy maybe, a young boy, with so delicate featurs and those blue blue eyes and blond long hair. Oh man~ I can feel like I'm a paedophile already even though he's like 33 years old.

He was supposed to have already retired from international football to prolong his club career with Juventus, but he was persuaded to come out of retirement by the national coach to help his team to win, this just shows his importance to the team. Of course, European Footballer of the Year also adds that prestige in him. Everytime I see him on the pitch, my heart would flutter, not even any of my favourite football players can do this to me. omg~

Interestingly enough, I haven't talked about any of my favourite football players, nor have I posted their pictures up here. Because I'm now going to discuss another issue involving them.

The English captaincy after the World Cup.

We all know that David Beckham is the current English captain. Those who don't know are probably not football spectators. But well, Beckham is old, and with a new coach coming in after Sven Goran Eriksson leaves, I'm guessing that there'd be a new captain. Even though Beckham might still be playing in games from time to time, I think there will be a new captain to lift the burden off Beckham and also to spark off a new era of English football. Now the question is, who will be the next captain?

The current vice captain is Michael Owen. But I don't think he'll become captain. Backtrack a few years ago, Liverpool's captaincy question. Owen was the vice captain, but he didn't become captain. To Owen, the position of captaincy was too heavy a burden for him to carry and it was starting to weigh him down. In fact, after Gerrard was named captain, Owen started playing better being relieved off the burden of captaincy. With this past history of Liverpool's captaincy, I don't think the next coach would not learn of history and burden Owen with more misery and affect the team's efficiency. Hence, I'd be betting against Owen, not that his odds are very good anyway.

The forerunners of captaincy are namely John Terry, Chelsea's captain, Steven Gerrard, Liverpool's captain, and Frank Lampard, Chelsea's vice captain. I remember in an international match once when Beckham was not playing, after Owen was taken off, the captain's armband was passed to Terry, showing us that little bit of evidence who might just become captain in the future. Of the three of them, I still like Terry the most and of course would want him to be the captain, and I believe he has the ability after reading reports from the Chelsea camp saying that Terry is great in organising social outings and building team spirit (probably in the form of going to gambling dens together. hahaha~), so I'd think he's make just a good leader for England. But well, the national team also need that bit of marketing and sponsorship, and Terry is just not as glamourous as Beckham, or Gerrard and Lampard because of his position of a defender. This might count against him.

I've read another analysis saying that because of sponsorship deals, the FA might pressurise the new coach to keep Beckham so that they can have the adequate funding needed. That is unless they can get other fundings from other faces. Lampard and Gerrard have that edge. Well, adidas have recently signed Lampard as one of their spokesperson, but Gerrard is after all Liverpool's captain. I'm not sure if that would count for or against him, but I'd of course definitely prefer Lampard to Gerrard. And of course, of given me the choice to choose my captain, I'd just heck care the FA, and go ahead and hand the captain's armband to Terry of course.

But of course, I won't be placing a bet on it. I never bet on anything that involves teams like like. I never bet on Chelsea because I think I'm afraid. lol~ Even though Terry is like one of the biggest bettor, I don't think I'd ever emulate him. Usually I bet small, or bet in kind rather than in cash. I don't think I'd be betting in the World Cup, although I must say that feeling detached from the teams actually makes me more level headed to make calculated bets. But well, I don't have access to Singapore Pools over here and I have no idea how to use internet betting portals, nor do I actually trust those sites.

Anyway, there hasn't been any major upsets in this this world cup as yet, and I'm not predicting any major upsets. Switzerland, Spain, and Ukraine would most probably win their matches, I'd take Spain to win big, since I'm not expecting Casillas to make many saves, I'd expect a cleansheet for Spain too. Switzerland, probably a one goal advantage. Not so sure about Ukraine, if Shevchenko is in form, I'd expect goals, but if he's not getting the support, maybe a marginal win.

Tuesday's matches, I'm not saying anything on Germany vs Ecuador except I want Germany to win and top the group, but that's a want. hehehe~ Costa Rica and Poland, both losers, no point to bet not point to guess, since both are going home, it doesn't matter who wins or loses or draw or whatever. So, I'd take it as a high scoring match. England vs Sweden, I want England to win, so that England will top the group and if German wins too then they won't face each other, yet. But since I'm also supporting England, I won't bet on them. Paraguay and Trinidad and Tobago, if Trinidad and Tobago wins by a couple of goals and England wins, Trinidad will go through, but will they? I'd take Trinidad for a draw and Sweden to go through (by a loss though), because I think Paraguay got what it takes to prevent Trinidad from winning, hopefully. Or if not, I'd take Trinidad to win Paraguay by a goal.

I'll save the other matches for another time, I'm really getting very tired now. I've spent three hours on this blog entry. Oh my god... And I'm reminded by someone that I've yet put up my travel logs on Benelux. There's one big big thing that I want to talk about Luxembourg, but the preview is already up on his blog. damn... You'd have to hear from him first before you hear from the original source. And tomorrow is a long day ahead... hai... I think I need go sleep now, it's three hours past the time you see on the timestamp of this post.

Good night~

Sunday, June 18, 2006

AMVs, Youtube, Animes, Mangas, Wuxia Novels

Quite a weird title, but I've so many unrelated things I want to say, and this is the only way I can think of to link all of them up together. Of course, I can separate them, but well, I'm Joan Ang, the girl who writes long long blog entries and make all of you read everything, although I know nobody actually does read everything. bah~

Just now I was watching my fix on youtube when I realised something to my big big horror. My Chinese deproved by a lot. I now hereby conclude that I've returned every of my Chinese back to the gutter where it was supposed to be.

I've always prided myself as one of those effectively bilingual people, who can speak, read, and write effectively in both English and Chinese. By now everyone should know that I speak, read and write English. If you don't then I suppose you need to get your eyes checked because you are now staring at cold hard evidence. A lot of people may not realise that my Chinese is better than what I let people realise. Not wanting to speak in Chinese to people is not because I don't speak it well, but because I just don't want to speak it to you.

I know some people share this same habit as me. I don't like to speak in Chinese with people I'm not close with. If I meet someone new, I'd definitely speak to the person in English. But between close friends, the medium of communication is mostly Chinese. Even with the girls (except of course Rozie), I'd sometimes lapse into Chinese because to me, Chinese is more intimate. I'd even sometimes lapse into Chinese with Jasmine. To me, these comes naturally with people I feel comfortable with. With the, I'd feel so comfortable that I don't make an effort to think. In my laziness what comes out is often imperfect English and quite a bit of Chinese.

English to me is a proper language. Although I seldom speak proper English on MSN, I cannot argue anything in Singlish, when I argue, proper English naturally comes out of me. I think it's the processing of my brain. When I think about stuff, my brain processes entirely in English, but when I'm lazily chatting about mundane stuff, my brain shuts down and Singlish and English without grammar comes out of me. Chinese is somewhat the same. I speak in Chinese without the need to think, but that's not pure Chinese, that's just Singapore version of Chinese. If I think and write and process Chinese, I need to use my brain. Most of the time I'm too lazy to do it, so I just treat it that my Chinese sucks.

Okay, I think I'm starting to digress. Anyway, my point today is about me reading mangas in English and Chinese. I'm sure by now after writing so many blog entries about that time I thought Rin was pregnant, you guys should know that I prefer to read English mangas instead of Chinese. But, counting the number of sets of English and Chinese mangas that I own, I actually have more Chinese than English mangas. For one, my entire collection of 52 volumes of Detective Conan are in Chinese. I thought I had no problem understanding it.

I thought.

After watching English subbed animes, I realised that I missed out one very important clue to the identity and motive of Vermouth. All along, I knew Vermouth had a soft spot for Shinichi/Conan, and it's possible that she knows that Conan is Shinichi. And I know that she knows Yukiko personally, and they are very close, and I know of her part in the New York case, but but but I didn't know that she was that Japanese serial killer. dang~ Remember the long silver haired Japanese serial killer in New York, the one Ran and Shinichi faced, and he almost wanted to kill them, but he almost had an accident and they saved him.

Well, after that I thought he died. I thought he was shot by that Shuichi Akai guy. But after watching several episodes of Detective Conan with English subs, I found out that actually Vermouth was that Japanese serial killer. She went undercover to locate Shuichi Akai and wanted to kill him or something, but she failed. That also explains why she let Conan off when she could have killed him. And why she called him "Cool Guy" and Ran "Angel". Because they saved her life!

I don't know what's wrong with my Chinese. Or is it that I only can't read Chinese in manga because I can still read my wuxia novels and understand them totally. yea... I'm a big fan of wuxia novels, especially those by Liang Yusheng. I've a few of those back at home. And I've downloaded a couple of ebooks from the net sometime back. I've read those ebooks straight from my computer screen and I understand them all. So why can't I understand my manga?

Anyway, speaking of downloading wuxia novels, that day I was browsing though my external hard disk drive and spotted a downloaded wuxia novel by Liang Yusheng that I've no recollection of reading it. It was only after I opened it that I remembered why I hadn't read it. hai...

Okay, I went to wiki Liang Yusheng, so I'll start my story from what I've found out. Apparently Liang Yusheng said that his favourite novels are 《萍踪侠影录》, 《女帝奇英传》 and 《云海玉弓缘》. Coincidentally, I own all three of these books~ As in I have the hard copy books lying on my bookshelf back at home, not the pirated kinds nor the downloaded ones. I bought the books with cold hard cash in a bookshop. And granted, my all time favourite novel is none other than his favourite of the three, 《萍踪侠影录》. I did like 《女帝奇英传》 but I didn't like the ending. I can't remember much about the story now though. Damn... I must go back home and read them once again, but I do remember that that is the first part of a series of four novels, following that are 《大唐游侠传》, 《龙凤宝钗缘》 and 《慧剑心魔》 in that order. The problem with these sort of novels is that the characters are repeated in another novel and they well, aren't that appealling becase there are other more appealling characters.

Take for example 《萍踪侠影录》, follows that is 《散花女侠》, well, the female protagonist sort of became a not so important character, and there was one more that follwed where the female protagonist just sort of disappeared from the male protagonist's life even though she's supposed to be his wife. But anyway, I still like 《萍踪侠影录》 by itself~

But then, even though I like the story of 《云海玉弓缘》, I cannot bring myself to like too much because of the other novels that follows. The main character in 《云海玉弓缘》 is this guy called Jin Shiyi. He's recurrent in many other other novels, and some not in a very favourable light. He appears also in 《冰川天女传》 where he acts at the antagonist as he tries to spilt the two very much in love leading characters. I first read that book, and didn't have a very good impression of him. But of course, my mind totally changed when I read 《云海玉弓缘》 and read the story of Jin Shiyi and Li Shengnan. But there're a few more stories that follow, and I've read one of them before this, and hence I know the ending of this story even before I read it.

I've written about this before. You can read the full posting here. But if you are too lazy to click that link (it doesn't matter anyway, that's a mostly picture blog entry), I'll say it simply here. Jin Shiyi was torn between Li Shengnan and Gu Zhihua. I don't like Gu Zhihua, but from a later story, I know that the son of Jin Shiyi calls Gu Zhihua his mother, so obviously Jin Shiyi didn't end up with Li Shengnan. In the end of 《云海玉弓缘》, Li Shengnan sacrificed herself, and Jin Shiyi realised that he did loved her and left Gu Zhihua. If the story ended there, I'd now proudly say that 《云海玉弓缘》 would be my most favourite novel ever ever.

But But But.

Five paragraphs up, I said that I downloaded a book but never read it, yea... That book chronicles the love story of Gu Zhihua and Jin Shiyi after the death of Li Shengnan, and twenty years after her death, the both of them got married. Fuck~ With him ending up with Gu Zhihua, how can I like him? And to factor in that he once liked Bingchuan Tiannü from 《冰川天女传》 and had even tried to cause a rift between her and Tang Jingtian, how can I still like him??? But I still do, only when in 《云海玉弓缘》 though. Maybe it's because I really like Li Shengnan...

I like tragic characters, and love that is not meant to be. That's why I like yaoi, because it's not meant to be. Speaking of yaoi, I'm now hooked onto xxxholic and I strongly suspect that there might be more to Watanuki and Domeki's relationship. Hints of Shonen-ai, I hope.

I've been following youtube for latest episodes of xxxholic, and also Tsubasa Chronicles. Youtube is really one amazing portal~ But right now I can't watch the latest episodes of both. Tsubasa Chronicles 32 is a RAW version, meaning it's not subbed while xxxholic 11 is Chinese subbed. I'm wondering if I should just go ahead and watch it RAW or Chinese subbed or should I wait. hai... Every day I log onto youtube and check if there are new episodes that it's fast becoming a habit already. I'm really addicted to these sort of things, and the thing is that the latest episodes aren't even out yet in Japan. bah~

Actually, I can read Chinese, so what is it that is preventing me from wanting to watch xxxholic 11 Chinese subbed? I don't know... I guess I'm afraid ba... Afraid that I might read something wrong. Or maybe I just prefer to read English subbed. For one thing, I prefer to hear and read the names of Japanese characters in Japanese, so in this respect I don't like reading Chinese, since I tend to pronounce the names in Chinese rather than in Japanese when doing so. hai... But I'm really itching to watch. sucks~ I'm hoping that after I finish with this blog entry I'd be too shagged to watch anything. So this entry shall be a long long one to wear me out if not for anything else.

I just made an AMV of Tsubasa Chronicles. I think I'm becoming an otaku already. wahaha~

This is my first AMV, and my second/third time using Windows Movie Maker.

My first time using Windows Movie Maker is to make this thing.

And this thing...

They both seem like they are essentially thing same thing that I don't know if I'm supposed to see them as my first and second effort or just my first effort. Either way, A Song of Storm and Fire is still my first AMV. I'm thinking of making a second AMV, of xxxholic. Still conceptualising my theme, hopefully I can turn my concept into reality~ And slowly join the youtube league of AMV makers~ wahaha...

But the thing about me making AMVs is that I don't have anime clips that I can work on. The only anime I have is Full Metal Alchemist, which I don't think I'd ever make any AMV with it since the whole thing is about brotherly love. hai... Even in the movie, Edward made the decision to leave Winry for Alphonse. Like that how to make AMV? Okay, it's still possible to make lots, and if you run a search in youtube you'd still find a lot, but the thing is that Joan is a sucker for love stories, so she can't make AMVs talking about brotherhood, unless she turns it into a incest-shonen-ai thingie and scare everyone away with it.

Posting stuff on youtube, I've always still been quite low key, but recently one of my videos attracted a few comments and bashings. I think I've been totally misunderstood.

It's this video...

The one where I was imitating Goebbels.

You can watch the video here and read the comments too.

I don't know what are some people thinking. I've already said that it's Joan being stupid, yet they still comment that the video's stupid. Then some people think I'm neo-Nazi or something. Nazism is still quite a taboo topic, but that doesn't mean we cannot talk about it at all. The point of my speech when I did that imitation is that I wanted to try and recreate that kind of atmosphere in which Goebbels made his speech so that people can understand why the nazi party was so popular. It was because of the oratorical capabilities of the Nazis, especially Goebbels. But of course, the video turned out stupid.

Another thing I never understood and those people who commented I think they never even thought of it is the reason behind Goebbels pledging total loyalty to Hitler. This is turning pretty heavy from here... woohoo~ Goebbels started out as someone who greatly opposed Hitler. The early nazi party was factionalised into the north and south, Hitler was from the south, the then party leader and Goebbels were from the north. People always associate Hitler with the Nazi party that most don't know that Hitler didn't found that party. yea... The founder of the party was the persom whom Goebbels aligned himself with. But at that time, Hitler rose in popularity that the northern faction felt threatened, especially the party leader.

After some event, which I think I shall skip describing, Goebbels swore loyalty to Hitler. The question now is why. The official answer is that during a speech, Hitler amazed Goebbels with his rhetoric. But is it only so? Goebbels is a doctorate, a person of higher education and higher social status, as compared to Hitler, the person who was rejected from all the art schools he applied for and didn't even have an Arbitur, an A level equivelent. So why was Goebbels willing to be the servant of Hitler?

Oh well, I don't have all my reference books with me now, so I can go on and write paper about this over here, I can only give my own personal view without any basis, and say that it is most probably because of Hitler's oratorical capabilities. But then again, Goebbels seems to educated to be taken in by pure rhetoric, and he's just a capable as Hitler in rhetorics, so then this might not be a valid reason after all. sigh~

The mysteries of history, I guess~

I'm effectively tired now, but I still have some more stuff to do. I think maybe I shall sleep first then continue my stuff later tomorrow, or should I now? hmm... I promise, I promise I'd do up my travels pretty soon. I've got like pictures from 8 towns lor Konstanz, Singen, Triberg, Luxembourg, Brussels, Utrecht, Amsterdam, Kinderdijk. hai... But right now I'm fixing up my travel journal, so my photoshop's tied up. I've created a photo album in that travel journal portal and am uploading ALL my photos, the only problem is that I have to resize all my photos, so it's very tedious.

I'll post the link of that travel journal here sometime soon. As soon as I get a decent journal up first.

Until then~

Saturday, June 17, 2006

What is Truth?

I'm a football fan.
I'm a Detective Conan fan.
I've been spending the last couple of weeks watching the World Cup 2006, and when there aren't matches, I'm watching Detective Conan on youtube.

In between watching the World Cup and Detective Conan today, I browsed through the official FIFA World Cup webbie on yahoo! and spotted this weird fact.

Country information for Czech Republic
The line that made me eye grow big and my jaw drop and started bursting into laughter? "Motto: Truth will prevail." Apparently that's the motto of the Czech Republic.

Does it sound familiar?

"Shinji tsuwa ichi mo hitotsu!"

Apparently, Conan (as Shinichi Kudo) has the same motto, only one truth will prevail.

As a motto of a young detective, I'd say it's encouraging, but as a motto of a country? It sounds pretty weird... Bah~ I shall now go back and dig up more weird facts about all the other 31 other countries participating in the World Cup 2006. I'll be back with a proper post when I've the time between my Detective Conan, World Cup, travels, school, photoshopping and AMV making. yea... And those are the things I really need to blog about, but later...

By the way, anyone knows what's Singapore's motto? I'm guessing that it'll be something just as stupid anyway...

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Lessons in University Freiburg with Joan

This comes at such an awkward time. The Germany national team has just beaten Poland, and everyone's still in a high mood, and here I am going to talk about school. The guys outside are singing "Hallo, Straßenbahn~", the cars outside are all honking the victory tune, and here Joan is typing to you guys about her lessons in Germany. bah~ But I've been meaning to do this post for the longest time already, should stop procrastinating. I'll talk about football maybe later or tomorrow. It's a public holiday tomorrow~

I don't know if I've mentioned this before or not, but here I go describing my school lessons in full details here.

I'm registered under the Geschichte faculty in University of Freiburg, which is History department. When I consulted the Professor counsellor in charge of freshies, or ersties, as they call them here, and told him that I needed to earn credits for my term here, he advised me to do one Proseminar, one Übung, and two Vorlesungen. And that's what I did.

For the Proseminars, we had to sign up before the start of the lessons, fill in three choices, and on the first day of school, we'd find out which we were posted to. I was advised to do "Victorian Great Britain" because "the lecturer speaks excellent English" and most of our texts are in English. The professor commented by the side of my sign up sheet to give me priority so in the end I only filled up two choices, the other being a module called "Mao's China" which I have absolutely no interest in but was advised to do because "there are many texts in English".

The other modules are show up and sign up. I showed up and signed up for an übung "Internet for Historians" because it has no readings, and two vorlesungen "Europe in the Late Middle Ages" and "Globalisation, Mentality, Politic and Sport in the 20th Century". An übung is a more hands on session, when things are done in small groups, and we do practices as the teacher teaches. A vorlesung is a lecture. A big lecture theatre lecture, no tutorial, no nothing, just every week go into a big lecture theatre and listen. A proseminar is a seminar, mine also has a compulsory tutorial, but it's very different from the NUS kind of lectures and seminars and tutorials we have.

My four lessons are spread out on four different days. On Monday 2-4pm I have the "Globalisation, Mentality, Politics and Sport in the 20th Century" vorlesung. It's in a not that big lecture theatre, about the size of perhaps LT 10 (erm... I've only been to lecture theatres in Arts Fac, so my references are all Arts references). Basically the lecture is about sports and it's relevance in politics and history in the 20th century. Lectures are peppered with lots of photographs and pictures from the past, and a favourite topic for sports in football, especially with Germany hosting the current World Cup, we get to talk a lot about that too.

But one thing I don't quite like about the lecture is that every week, the lecturer would repeat stuff from the previous lecture. It might be a recap, but I don't really understand much and i think it's a waste of time. And with our lessons now cut short by one hour, well, we learn lesser stuff. Yes, because of the World Cup, our lecturer decided to end lessons at 3pm so that we can all go back and watch the earlier matches.

Speaking of the end of lectures, in Germany, instead of clapping, we knock on the table with our knuckles. Although I've watched a video on the Wannsee Conference, and shows the German officials all knocking on the table, I didn't know that it's a social norm that is still practised throughout Germany. To my biggest surprise in my first talk I attended when everyone knocked on the table. I followed them, and slowly got used to it.

Another interesting thing I've noted about the students here is the notebooks they use. All of them use A4 sized notebooks. In Singapore, we are exposed to notebooks of different sizes, and personally I'm more used to B5 sized notebooks, the Japanese sized ones because I carry small bags, and B5 sized notebooks fit nicely inside my bag. Over here, I bought myself an A5 sized notebook because I still find that A4 is too big for my bag. Another thing about their notebooks is that they are squared, not lined. Little boxes... To fit in with the student population here, I bought one of those boxed notebooks. My German housemate says she prefers them because they can help her keep her handwriting neat. For me, I think it's good because I can do indentation with it.

In my lectures, although I listen in German, my notes are all done in English, only certain phrases and words do I copy them in German. I still can't write in German well. And I've a problem with past tense.

Tuesday is my free day. Usually I stay at home and sleep and slack and watch television or youtube. Sometimes I go down to the library to photocopy my readings for my Friday's proseminar.

Photocopying in Germany is damn expensive. Each sheet of paper costs 5.3 cents (euro cents) as compared to our 2.5 Singapore cents back in NUS. Also the photocopying machines here much less fewer in quantity. There are always long queues to photocopy stuff. In the department library, there are three machines. In the main library, the machines are spread out, with 3-4 machines in each location. Unlike in NUS where there is one main photocopying room with so many so many machines and I never needed to queue, although I did need to queue when I go to the Malaya and Singapore collection to photocopy stuff.

Speaking of libraries, the system here is that we have one main library, the UB, or university bibliothek, but also department libraries. This history library is called the KGIV library because it's in KGIV. Books in the department library cannot be loaned out. Even in the UB, only those on certain floors can be loaned out, those in the LS, Lesaales, cannot be loaned out. The libraries, don't have an RBR system. I think the libraries here work on a trust system. The books aren't even tagged, those books which cannot be loaned out are all not tagged, but then again, the students here are not allowed to bring bags or coats into the library and have to leave them in the Garderobe, locker room, which is actually not a locker at all but a place for people to put their stuff unguarded. It's all about honesty and trust.

What is KGIV? The university buildings are called KGI, KGII, KGIII, and KGIV. There are only four buildings in the university campus. It's sort of like our AS1, AS2, AS3, AS4, AS5, AS6 and AS7 like that, only that KG stands for Kollegien Gebäude, and if you don't know, I, II, III, IV are roman numerals. The classrooms are numbered just as how ours are numbered. Lecture theatres are HS (Hösaal), the rooms are all 4digits, the first is the KG number, the second is the floor level, the third and fourth are the room numbers. 1231, would be in KGI, 2nd floor and 2004 would be in KGII, ground floor.

Wednesday I have my "Internet for Historians" class. Actually it's alternate Wednesdays, 3-5pm. Another piece of evidence to show that the Germans are slack. I went for class on the first day and the lecturer said that other than the next week, the following lessons are fortnightly.

Classes are not held in the university grounds because we get to use computers, and the university building doesn't have computer labs, so we go to external grounds but still university campus to use the computer labs. My first class was quite bad because I've got the wrong address for the computer lab, but lucky I didn't go to the wrong place.

The lecturer speaks in fast German, and with it being hands on, I often have trouble keeping up with the class. Luckily I've got a helpful neighbour. Mostly I sit beside this guy called Sebestian, although sometimes I don't, and everytime I can't catch up, I'd ask him what to do. Lessons are mostly teaching us how to use the internet to search for historical materials. For this module, we do not have exams, neither do we need to do a term paper, just do our homework is enough. Lessons are tough for me to keep up, but other than that, the amount of work needed for this class is pretty slack.

On Thursdays 11-1pm I have "Europe in the Late Middle Ages". It's a big LT lecture, like a lecture in our LT11. The lecturer is a young woman. I'm quite skeptical of female lecturers, especially young ones, and this lecturer seems to be somewhat of my stereotypical female lecturer. She prepares a script and read from it as she gives her lecture, no jokes about other things, and not much spontanity from her. maybe because of the topic, lectures sometimes can be rather boring. And it's bad for me since my German is not good, and when it gets boring, it's more difficult for me to absorb much.

Luckily this lecture is one with powerpoint slides, so at least when I'm lost I can always refer back to this powerpoint slides. This module also is one with online learning facility, sort of like an early IVLE thingie. We call it campus-online. Our IVLE is still more advanced than their campus-online, but it's interesting to see them also having something somewhat similiar although I don't really use it much.

Speaking of other oddities. I remember a senior, Terrence, telling me that I should go early to classes and sign up for them on the first class. But it seems like the university culture in Freiburg and Heidelberg is somewhat different. Taking that advice, I went for classes very early and found that everyone went to classes late. There was no such thing as a rush for places in the class. After a couple of weeks of lessons, then I finally realised that although officially in time tables classes start from x-y time, the classes de facto starts 15min after the stated time. For all the classes, they start 15min late, and end 15min early, so in fact our classes are only one and a half hours.

But there are usually no pauses in between. Although my "Globalisation, Mentality, Politic and Sport in the 20th Century" has a 5min break in between when we still ended classes at 4pm. I don't really like that because I have short attention span and can get bored easily. Back in NUS, I'd always use the break in between to buy food so that I can stay awake. But then again, here, all my classes start late, so I still don't have problems in keeping myself awake.

On Fridays I have my proseminar, "Victorian Great Britain". From 12-2pm I've the tutorial, and 2-4pm the seminar. The tutorial is not like our tutorial, where we talk about the topic, the tutorial is a more general kind of tutorial where we are exposed to the working of the school and of the department. We talk about finding materials in the library and the different sort of materials we can get, and more general history stuff. The tutor, like in NUS, is a student tutor. And my tutor is damn shuai. wahaha~

Seminars are more like NUS tutorials, where we read a reading before class and come to class discussing the readings with a group of student leading the discussion and every week a different group leads, and we are graded for the discussion too. My lecturer for this module is a young male teacher who studied in England and hence his ability to speak "excellent English". But although the prerequisite of this class is to be able to understand English due to the texts we have to read, not everybody in the class is good in English.

I just had a project group meeting with two classmate, for the leading of the discussion for one session, and both of them said that they English isn't that good. I didn't really have much time and ability to communicate with them both, but one of them, interestingly enough, is a Sinology student. He said that this proseminar was actually his third choice, so I guess that explains. Oh, by the way, I think it's cool for him to study Sinology. I once saw one of his readings and it was one of Sima Guang and the pot of water, in Chinese. I don't know how many of you remember but we had a similar reading back in primary school.

The story goes like this, a group of kids were playing and one of hem fell into a huge pot of water and was drowning. The clever young Sima Guang, probably only 5-6 years old at that time, in bid to save his friend, threw stones and broke that pot allowing the water to flow out and his friend not to drown and also to escape. Sima Guang was praise for his cleverness and quick thinking. I used to get mixed up between Sima Guang and Sima Qian, the former is that clever little boy who grew up to be a young minister, one of the youngest ministers at that time while the latter is an historian, an old one, also very famous, think he was the one who complied the History of China from the early ages to the Han time. I don't think they are related.

Learning a new language is difficult. Me learning German proves just it. But learning a new script altogether is more than just difficult, it's crazy. Really admire Lorenz. I know at this age I can never master writing a new script altogether.

I have an average of 9 hours of lessons a week. Considering, I'm very slack. My housemates have about 16 hours of lessons a week because they study two subjects while I'm studying only one. Even Lorenz, he said that he does 14 hours a week, with his language studies while compare to me back in NUS with my 17 hour weeks with languages. Although the other Arts students have 15 hour weeks without languages, so for the Arts students, it's about the same. Though the other fac students do more hours, but who cares about them anyway. wahaha~

I was just having this online jibe with this Engin student though his blog.

xxoos: eh, which year are you in now?
siu hang: I'm 20 plus. (alright year one point five, if round up to one significant figure then it's two)
tstar: Er if you want to be really accurate, it's actually year 1.75 (I calculated it), but round up also same lah..
siu hang: how did you get that number....
nakazawa: Simple, 1 year have 4 sems - 2 proper 2 special. We should be finishing 1st special sem, so it is 1.75... 3rd out of 4 sems.
xxoos: diaoz... i asked which year are u in not how old are u... bah~ typical engin student, don't understand english~ wahaha~
xxoos: bah~ all the engin students, can't talk in english, must try and do maths talk... diaoz~
siu hang: lol! arts students always ignore words in bracket huh? oopz I forgot proper endnote and citation...
xxoos: words in brackets are meant for citations, since i don't read citations, i just plainly ignored the words in the brackets.

Full exchange can be found here. Or you can visit his blog to see how typical Engin students are like. His own tag line is already "You think engineers can't write? I'll prove you right." yea... -_-"

I think I'll die next semester when I get back to NUS and will need to start on my cross facs and sci GEMs. I will die. Just as how Siu Hang died-ed when he did his SS, but that's course he went to do a Farrell module, so it's still his fault, who asked him to go choose Farrell's module. In Germany, the students don't need to do stupid stuff like cross facs and GEMs and SS modules. Lucky them~

That's all I can think of at the moment, any questions about SEP or Germany or school here can email me and ask me. I think after my this stint I can go back NUS and advise those students preparing for SEP liao~ wahahaha~