Monday, April 11, 2005

A Joke Carried Too Far~

A Joke Carried Too Far~

I'm sure by now most of my friends would know that I'm quite a mischievous person. I cannot resist a good jibe when I'm in a bitchy mood. Okay, I won't say bitchy, but more of in a fun-loving, happy mood. I'd like to make fun of people. And I'm good at that cos I'm witty. A bit bhb liao, saying myself as witty, but well, it's the truth. To some people, I might be a brainless little bimbo, but Joan didn't come this far without brains. She's smart.

Since I'm smart and witty, I can make good jibes without getting ribbed back, and even if I get ribbed back, I'm always ready with a quick and good comeback line. And because sometimes I get too carried away with myself, I get lost in my own jokes. Too many a time I offend people unknowingly due to my careless words. I've been trying to note my limits and prevent myself from pushing it. This usually happens when I'm in a more solemn mood. When I'm more sensitive and well, plain nice.

Back to my main point, when I'm not nice. I push limits too far back.

Maybe before I describe my joke, I'll give my rationale behind the joke. I did it in good spirits and I thought that part was able to take it. I didn't realise the repurcussions it could have on me and others. When I did it I only thought of that person. I did it to lighten up the atmosphere and so that we can get to know each other better since we were going to be working with each other for quite some time. There were also other selfish reasons, like I was on a pretty high mood and I wanted to ka chiao someone and he was an easy target.

That target was my laoban.

Whatever I did, had no hidden meaning behind and no other meanings. The photo albums, the tribute, the everything was just a big jibe. Yes, it's pretty mean of me to say things like that, but I think this time I've taken this fun a bit too far. Not just for him, but also for me.

After doing so many things to ka chiao him, apparently everybody thinks that I like my laoban.

I must admit that my laoban is a very nice person, and I think that he'd make a good boyfriend, BUT it's not in my mind, or any sort of intention to have any feelings towards him other than him as my laoban. fullstop. period. that's it. ju hao.

But people don't seem to realise that. And now they are making fun of me and my laoban. This is bad. Not just for me, but also my laoban. And the worse thing is that this is a double-edged sword, no matter how I react to this it will reflect badly on me. I can't protest against it, or it might make me look guilty, nor can I appear excited about these remarks cos it maight seem like I do like him, so how am I supposed to react sia?!

Right now I'm putting up and indifferent front. And when people ask me about it, I just roll my eyes, hoping they get the hint that Joan is not interested in her laoban in that sense, but it doesn't seem to be working well. Not with her continuing to jibe her laoban. I really wanted to stop all the poking fun of, really, cos I think I'm taking it too far, but well, it's not easy to stop. this is the only upper hand I have of my laoban and I cannot put it down. hehe~ So far most of my friends' weaknesses are kept locked up in my mind so that I can always use it against them. Especially those who are ticklish, beware of Joan~ hehe~

I'm starting to sound very mean. But I do have my weak points too, just see if you can figure it. hehe~ Think so far, not many people know what it is, so I'm safe. hahahaha...

Oh no, this is bad. I'm supposed to sound apologetic and here I am so full of myself. damn girl! Okay, so now, Joan is making this clear that she would stop all irritants on her laoban. She would've revoked some of her past mischiefs of her laoban, like the yahoo photos album and the tribute, but then again, that is not just put up to ka chiao my laoban, but also a showpiece of my photography skills and my writing skills, so I've decided not to take them down. I'd have done it even for anyone else.

Maybe if I do up more albums and tributes people will then realise that Joan treats all her friends the same and she is not doing anything special for a certain person? ahh~ maybe... But nobody seems to like me doing these on them. hehe~ Really, who would sia? haha...

Some people are trying to probe into Joan's love life at the present moment, including my damn bagua sister, sad to say, Joan got nothing to report. Still single, lonely, and not looking. Think the status quo suits me fine. I've time for myself, time for friends, time for fun and time for serious businesses. Just hope that the status quo can still remain after my trip from Germany. Though one month isn't really a very long time, it's still quite long. Many things can happen, many things can change. If from the bottom of my sincere heart, I preserve the status quo during my trip, do you think it can remain like this?

Some things just aren't about individuals. Just like my laoban, id he hadn't done anything that might have encouraged me to ka chiao him, do you think I'd so gladly have went to ka chiao him?

I'm not pushing the blame to him. As what I told him before, if he really didn't want me to ka chiao him, I wouldn't do it. That's why I'm putting a stop to all these nonsense now.

Laoban~ baozhong ba!

Think I'm used to adding postscripts after blog entries.

I was thinking about my jibes on other people and I realised that between this other group of friends, there's also another jibe. Between the *ding-ding* there's the jibe on Stanley's brother. Stanley's younger brother, like yea right. Think I've only myself to blame for the consequences.

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