Saturday, January 21, 2006

Sorry 背影

Sorry -- An Excerpt

She lay in her bed with her eyes half closed. She tossed under her sheets and reached out for ther person who was supposed to be beside her, but all she grasped were more sheets. Her eyes flickered open immediately. The coldness of her bed beside all scared her. She bolted upright, all sense of tiredness was pushed to the back of her head.

He sat at the foot of her bed, buttoning up his shirt. His pants still lay on the floor beside the bedpost. As soon as she saw him, she pounced on to him and grabbed him tightly, wrapping her arms round his chest. She buried her head in his back. He took no more than a second to brush her arms away from him, he pushed her back. She fell back into her bed among her sheets. She looked up and stared at him almost pleadingly.

"Please don't go," she begged as she wrapped her arms round his waist, once again burying her face in his shirt and dampening it in the process.

He broke free from her grip again and pushed her back into her bed. He stood up to wear his pants, leaving her in a mess in her own bed. She stared hard at his back, hoping that she was able to will him to turn his head back to look at her, but she failed. She got up once again and knelt at the foot of her bed wrapping her arms round his neck. She brought her face to the back of his head and smelt the familiar smell of his hair.

"Please don't leave me alone," she whispered into his ear just before he pushed her away for the third time.

She fell head first into her bed and buried her head under the sheets staining them with her tears. She was not able to control those tear from flowing out of her eyes. She stared hard at the guy whom minutes ago told her she was the most beautiful woman on earth. The change was so sudden and shocking that she was unable to comprehend what was going on.

She looked hard at his back. "It's late. Please stay for the night, please I beg you," she pleaded, choking on her own tears. She couldn't help but start sobbing. If there was anything she so wanted at this moment was for him to turn his head back and just look into her eyes. She would melt. However, he did nothing.

He walked away from her bed towards the door. Without turning his head back, he uttered, "I'm sorry."

She stared at his back as he slipped out of her room and shut the door behind him. She stared at the door as it shut itself in front of her. She stared into space hoping that the door would open itself again. She stared at the door hoping to be able to see him walking through that door the next moment. She stared through her tears. Everything became a blur.

Slowly, reality sank in, she turn back to her sheets and the pillow he rested his head on a couple of minutes before. She bend down and buried her face in the pillow drawing a huge breath at the moment. She smelt him, she smelt him right beside her, and then she opened her eyes startled, he was gone. Unable to control herself, the tears streamed out. She cried out loud. She continued piling the sheets over her and burying herself deep into the bed hoping that she might lose herself by doing so.

The sheets turned damp and salty. She turned into a bag of nerves. She couldn't understand, it was a very simple request, and yet he couldn't oblige her. She felt cheapened.

《背影》 -- 短篇一则












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