I wanted to post this yesterday night but I couldn't find the lyrics to the song I wanted to post, so I postponed it.
Yesterday morning, I woke up woth a song stuck on my head, I kept singing the above two lines, "say goodbye... 现在就离开 放下我的不忍你的爱 goodbye...", so the whole day, I set my music player in my N70 to this song one repeat mode. Perhaps because the night before I went to sleep in tears, I don't know why, but I was in tears. Some nights I just can't fall asleep before I have a good cry, maybe not a big cry, but just let all the tears and frustrations out. It's very difficult to say goodbye. I've been trying. Coming all the way to Germany and forcing myself to say goodbye is one method, but now that the end of my almost like a dream trip, I fear that when I go back to Singapore, I'd say hello again. And the cycle of hurt and pain will continue again.
Maybe sort of like a sense of deja vu, or that there's a bond between me and my friends, I came home yesterday to read this in a friend's blog.
Just as her other Chinese blog post moved me to tears, this did not disappoint either. Maybe because I see myself in such a position too. I've been trying to tell myself I'm stupid, I've been letting people tell me I'm stupid, but in the end, I'm not really stupid, I'm just consoling myself by deeming myself as stupid.
I shall not sink into depressed mode today, so I shall continue with my narrations rather than rants. So, that night I badly wanted the lyrics to the song that kept playing in my head. I headed first to BaiDu. I mean, those Chinese really have piracy brought up to this level, where else can I go? But to my surprise, Baidu didn't have the lyrics. I tried google and yahoo seaches, neither yielded results. I ended up in some places which touted to provide that lyrics, but they turned out to be farce links.
I turned to my resident provider, and he too did nothing to help.
Then I proposed the last resort measure. Which isn't really that desperate a measure if I were at home back in Singapore where everything is within my reach. You see, that song is not a very popular song. Unless you are a fan, you'd probably never heard of it. But I have the song. Because I bought the CD. I think this might be incomprehensible to some people, but I do own that CD, so I have the lyrics book, but back at home.
I'm a nice person, and it was late at night in Singapore, so I didn't want to bother my provider and force him to be my errand boy and do paiseh stuff.
But just as I was thinking of when I can email or SMS my sister to get her online to do me the favour and copy the lyrics from the booklet for me, she turned up online tonight. It might not be unusual to those people who are online 24/7 but my sister is under the control of the emperor and dowager at home, and internet access is limited to their permission, and she hasn't been online for more than a week already. But I was pleasantly surprised to see her online tonight. It seems like more than a coincidence.
The lazy sister scaned the lyrics booklet for me and sent it to me. I typed it out.
The title is damn cheesy. There's nothing techno about the love song if you read the lyrics, but just because that song's genre is techno gives it the title Techno.Love, yes, with that period in there. It's so turn of the century. Granted I like the lyrics. Li Yuhuan wrote the song himself, the lyrics and the composition and he probably arranged it himself. He's by profession a music arranger and producer having done songs for like Faith Yang, Mavis Fan and other Taiwanese experimental singers.
Feel like making a music video out of this song.
I don't know if this will end up as yet another of Joan's impulse decisions anot, but I really am interested in making music videos after a couple of attempts at AMV making. I like video editing, it's fun. But the thing about anime is that I don't have many clips to begin with, so often the result isn't as I'd like it to be. And the answer to this problem is for me to film these clips myself. But I can't do everything alone. I right now have already myself, one actress and one handyman. I need an actor before I can make plans. Hopefully I can find one, and hopefully this is not just one of my another rash impulsive cravings.
Anyway, this is the most recent AMV I've uploaded on Youtube. I've uploaded it sometime ago, but never found the correct time to put it up here, but thought that that video has something to do with my topic today.
The Other Guy
"a detective conan amv, but more like a fanfic though. an amv with 1920s shanghainese movie styled captions to complete the content of the amv to make it seem more like a piece of fanfic, with moving images.
involved characters include hattori heiji, kudo shinichi and toyama kazuha.
song used is unfaithful by rihanna.
it's still dedicated to jinwei."
- from my video description in youtube
I'm now making another AMV also for Detective Conan, but have been procrastinating due to my deadlines. After that I want to really use film and video a music video. I've a couple of songs that sound suitable to use, but well, I need the actors, and also need to make sure that I don't lose steam before I can complete it. bah~
It'd be nice if one day I can too put my stories into film. But we'll see...