Disclaimer: This is quite a risque topic for me to touch on, but I think it's important for me to voice out a couple of opinions after reading some stories about it. ALL THESE ARE JUST MY THOUGHTS. My own thoughts. If you happen to be a professor, there are two ways you can react, 1. Feel guilty about it because you are one of those. If you are guilty, feel guilty. Guilty as charged, you have no right to make any comments about my comments. 2. Counter my arguments, plead for your innocence, make a case for yourself, because you are innocent. Only if you are innocent.
Okay, I'll start proper, what would you think of when one mentions sexual bribery to you? My first impression was about policemen, from a neighbouring, I shall let it remain anonymous, country receiving sexual briberies from women from another let's shall not name it country and allowing those women to ply their trade of sexual activities in the country. Singapore is a state that emphasises a lot against bribery of any sort, and can even be considered as a police state, so such cases are rare here. In fact, I hope that one day I can say that there are no streetwalkers from that unnamed country in Singapore. I only hope.
I've been to Geylang in the middle of the night for supper before. I usually go with groups of friends, so it's quite safe. But I've seen streetwalkers before. In this entry, I'll use the term streetwalkers because I don't want to be too crude on them. They are humans too, they have mothers and fathers and some have children. I've seen them standing along the streets. The thing about them is that if there's no demand, there won't be supply. So, where does the demand come from? The demand is now my main point of focus.
If you know me personally, I'm sure you'd know my now famous maxim, "All men stray". I'd like to think that the only man who doesn't stray is my father. That I shall leave it open today because there are other pressing problems.
I was talking to a friend of mine, I think he'd prefer if he weren't named. He is a virgin. But he said too that there's also a possibility of men straying because of the primate need to release. That's what wives are for, I always thought, or girlfriends, so why streetwalkers? One possible argument is that because those men don't have a partner. But I know that's a crap reason. I know. Personally because I know bastards.
The thing about these bastards is that they are absolutely normal men. They might be beside you, behind you, taking the table next to you, in the toilet cubicle beside yours, or the urinal beside yours, or that they are people you know only that you don't know about their personal lives. For all I know, my dear professors in school might be visiting them as what the unnamed friend suggested. When men are lonely, when their partners are away, when they don't even have a partner, and need an outlet to release their passions, a paid worker is convenient.
Into the night life in Singapore, well, a lonely person don't even need to pay for these streetwalkers if they want sex. It's also convenient to check into a bar, or club, pick up a nice looking girl, how nice depending on how much alcohol he's just consumed. Okay, I admit now I'm overgeneralising that people who needs sex has to be men, I know there might be some other women who needs it too, but I think women are less likely to pay for sex, although one night stands might be a convenient choice for them. As what the unnamed friend said, what the professors do in their personal time is their personal business and as long as they don't let it affect their teachings, there's nothing I can do about it.
Maybe I'm living my own sheltered (it's an excuse, I guess) life, I'd want people I respect to be nice, clean, scandalous free people. Although I firmly believe that all men stray, I think of exceptions, people I respect are always expections. I'd like to think of my professors, teachers, and the likes of them are untainted people with little or no sexual desire. I know it's impossible.
Basically, anything I don't know won't harm me. But recently, I read this confession in an anonymous site. I shall let it remain anonymous. The gist of it is that this girl confessed that there was some sexual bribery going on between her and her professor. This is not the first time I heard it, I heard of another anonymous confession of a JC teacher letting a student bribe him with sexual favours. Of course, those are the only two I've heard which seemed to be local, okay, the one with the JC teacher has got to be local. I'd like to think that the first one isn't, but I think it most probably is. Other than local stories, I hear a lot more of those stories happening in the States. I don't know how prevalent it is in Japan, but quite a bit of the mangas I read involve a teacher-student relationship, although that relationship is based on true love instead of pure lust, or bribery. I know of at least two namable but I shall leave them anonymous Chinese teachers back from my Secondary School who married their students, but I guess love and marriage is still different from sex and bribery even though marriage does involve sex. Anyway, they are two teachers whom I do not like. One of them was in fact pure hateful, but that's another matter.
Put it into context, the more I think about it the more afraid I am. I am very afraid that the JC teacher might be one teacher whom I respect. I am very afraid that the professor might one one professor whom I respect. I am very afraid. Although a teacher/professor's private life has nothing to do with his teaching, much less with my life, but I've placed my respects in them. It's like living in a perfect made up world, and if one day cracks are to be formed, my whole world will collaspe. I say all men stray, except people whom I respect, so if one day I realise that people I respect stray too, I'd really think that all men are bastards. There is no more hope left in me.
I won't say I'm a saint, because I'm not. But I'd like to think that there are people whom I can look up to, people who are really good. People who are able to give me hope.
I shall not give any names here, but there are many people whom I respect in school. If one day I hear stories that these are the same people who accept briberies, I think I think... Actually I really don't know what I'd do.
You see, teachers and professors are different people from say footballers or rock stars. I will definitely be disappointed if one day I were to hear stories of my favourite rock star bedding some streetwalker, or some other girl even though he is already married, but I won't make a big fuss over it. It always seems like the entertainment industry is dark and sex-filled. I know some people might argue that myself would even like to bed my favourite rock star since I'm a self-proclaimed groupie and I make declarations of loves and openly say that I want to marry him, but truth is that, to me, he is god, or someone close to god. And sex with god is like taboo. Okay, I'm don't want to hear rumours or stories about that's the reason why priests like to have sex with kids, those paedophile them who shall not be named religion whom it seems like a stereotypical rumours, tales, and stuff.
Footballers are different too. John Terry can have all the sex in the world since he is in a power position of which he can attract lots of women. I love him, but still sex with him is like having sex with god, so unattainable. I've read stories of groupies telling of stories of having sex with celebrities and the whole surreal feel about it, but my point is that those are celebrities. Inacademic people. It's placing a different expectation on different groups of people. It's like a teacher walking into RGS and expecting the whole class to score A1 for Maths, but the same teacher expecting the whole class to merely pass if he/she's at a neighbourhood secondary school. It's placing a higher bar on them.
Teachers and professors to me are educated beings who can control themselves. They are different, to me. Of course, I know all men are the same, blah blah blah and stuff, but to me they really are people from a different planet. I won't say they are god, but to me they seem pretty much close to god, like a deity like that, also cannot have sex one. I don't know why. Okay, granted, I know men need to have sex unless you're castrated or something, maybe impotent, whatever, but still, to have sex with just any girl any where is a bit low to me.
And the worst thing of all. Streetwalkers, fine. One night stands, fine. Sexual bribery from students, that's pushing my moral limits a bit too far. No way I can accept that. If it's a forbidden love blossoming between a teacher and student, by all means, LOVE. Love is all forgiving. But sex for the sake of sexual needs and desires, it's sucks. No pun intended. One professor once told me that NUS is a microcosm of Singapore. I'd think that Singapore's tight anti-corruption laws would be similiar to that of anti-corruption policies enforced by NUS, but this does not stop my overactive imagination. All professors have their own little rooms in which anything can happen inside. If both parties don't say anything out, there's no way anyone would know about it. Right?
I seem to be saying that all professors are guilty with accepting sexual briberies. In the eyes of the law, it's "innocent until proven guilty", but to Joan, it's "suspect until proven innocent". Note, I used the term "suspect", not "guilty". There's an old Chinese folk tale. Once, the government clamped down on alcohol brewing in ancient China, the authorities captured all wine brewers under the charge that they own distilling eqiupment which they might use to distill wine. One sage asked the authorities to capture all men since all men possess a weapon that could be used to rape. The authorites relented. Yes, those men are not rapists, but they are all suspectible to rape. They are all equipped with the tools to rape, so unless they don't rape, they are all potential rapists.
This is my ideology. All men have the potential to stray. If they don't, good for them, they will be proven innocent. If they do, bad for them, they will be proven guilty. If they don't know what to do, they still have the potential and I think they should be monitors, and until further evidence is found, they are still suspects.
I wouldn't go so far to suspect all my professors and teachers from past present and future to have accepted briberies, since we all know Singapore is very tight about it, but underground, anything might have happened just that we don't know about it only.
As I was telling my unnamed friend, the same one I mentioned throughout this entry, there are lots of temptations around. A female ex-teacher of mine once told me not to wear too skimpy clothes to school in the university because "the professors are still mortal men". She's a teacher. She's been through university. She advised me that. What can I make out of it?
Granted, I'm fat and ugly and I've bad complexion and above all that I'm public enemy number one (with me being an ardent Chelsea fan, I'm hated by all men already), I won't have the chance of tempting anyone with my fats, but being in Arts, I do see loads of skimpily dressed, thin and pretty girls who are hardworking enough to paint their faces every day (I'm a fat lazy ass, or rather, I've a fat lazy ass. lol~), I stand nowhere near them. Sometimes I can't resist not oogling at them, so where do the professors stand? They have loads of pretty young girls swarming around them every day, how can they not be tempted?
And if they are tempted, how would I react about it? Not saying tempted to me la, but to those girls, and how I'd feel about them, those girls and those professors...
I don't know. I once did a role playing game about teacher-student seduction, but that was playing to the other party, not really playing to the role. Truth is, if I happen to know any account of something risque happening to somebody I know, I'd flip. It's too scary to think of it.
The opposite of love is hate. But the line between love and hate is very thin. If something I once held so dearly upon turns out to be farce, I think I'd lose all my senses. Feeling nothing is something that's worse than hate. Voidness.
Take the 9pm drama on channel 8 for example. Shuyang has gorwn up thinking that her mentor is the best dad in the world, is the best lawyer in the world, is the nicest person in the world. If she knows that he has an illegitimate son, we can't expect her feelings for him would be the same, would it? She already hasn't go any feelings left for her own biological dad who left her.
(If there's any professors out there reading this entry, until proven guilty, although suspect, I still respect you.)
(And another thing to note. Albeit a little scarier. I think there are lots of temptations in the polytechnics in Singapore too. My dad is a lecturer.)