I woke up this morning feeling good. The coke I had the night before had calmed down my nerves. Yesterday was a great day too out with the people from my immersion group. They are really an interesting bunch of friends.
But the day got off with a major hitch. I dropped one of my contact lenses and I can't find it. So now I'm stuck with my glasses for the whole day. I don't know if I'd get a disposal replacement, but until then I'd be bespectacled. If anyone knows me, would know that I absolutely despise my glasses, so I told myself that I'd be in a foul mood the whole day.
But my day wasn't so. Although class was langweilig, but I finally saw some light somewhere in between and my confidence grew. Partly also because of the company I was with. These people in my immersion programme can really crack me up. So much so that I didn't realise that I had my glasses on. I was in a good mood despite walking a long way to find out that i need to return to the optician another day because something cropped up. On any other day, I'd probably be seething through my crooked teeth.
I think it had to do with the fact that I ate two tomato puffs in the morning.
I was in a bright mood until I read an email from a friend.
It's amazing how someone's words can really bring tears to your eyes, not because something really touching or upsetting was written, but because of ignorance. That person would probably not realise that how some ignorant remarks can turn out to be the most devastating thing said to someone else. Or maybe I only have myself to blame. Why am I so affected by that email?
A line from my script, "What makes pain painer that it can already be? When you compare it with something happy." Why do I have so severe mood swings? Cos I let myself be fully immersed in my moods. When I'm happy I can be really happy, and when I'm not, I'd end up in a terrible state. Someone once asked me why am I so pessimistic. Cos I've seen things, both happy and sad.
Updates on my script (for those who care about it)
I'm 14 pages up. I changed the whole foundation of it. a three act play with a prologue and epilogue. Short scenes within each act cos I haven't got the time and energy to fully develop the idea yet. I remember when the last time I was writing something, my mood got seriously affected by my characters. I ended up feeling sad and lonely for a very long time. Think my mood is again being affected my my two main protagonists.
One is a pessimist, the other is a realist.
I've drawn out their life history and everything I can think about them. The more I think about them, the more I feel for them. Some people write about themselves into their characters, but I become what I write about my characters. It doesn't help that everything seems to be happening so. I think I write too much liao.
I hope I can finish this script as soon as possible. One less worry.