Today I've cleared three Detective Conan movies, I've watched Detective Conan Movie 5, Detective Conan Movie 6 and Detective Conan Movie 7. I'm thinking if I should watch Detective Conan Movie 8 tonight or should I go to bed now.
After more than one month of in Germany, I'm back to my nocturnal lifestyle. Although not as bad as when I was in Singapore, I think it's already pretty bad. And I think the factor is very importantly the prescence of internet that I can use. With internet, the sun just doesn't set. There are so many things which I can do online, and so many things for me to find out.
Today, I shall talk about Shinichi and Ran, and a little bit of a gem that I've just discovered.
I'll talk about Shinichi and Ran first and incorporate the other things as I go on since I've titled this as Shinichi and Ran, so focus will still be on them. Who are they? One might first ask. They are characters from Detective Conan, a long running manga series by Gosho Aoyama. You can read the wiki link, I'm too lazy to explain things further and especially if you know them and I go on explaining like you don't know them, I know how that feels, it sucks.
Shinichi and Ran are childhood friends who grew up to fall in love with each other but never got around to confessing their true feelings for each other until Shinichi's ordeal, and now there's probably no chance of them confessing to each other anymore. I used to be skeptical of this so called kind of childhood friends becoming lovers, but on screen, it just looks pretty envying. But anyway, they've now been separated by Shinichi's ordeal, not really a physical barrier, and i can feel their pain.
Maybe I'm thinking too much. I'm really watching too much anime until it's corrupting me like what somebody once pointed out to me. I felt quite moody after two night of watching Conan movies that just now after watching the three Conan movies I went out to think kitchen and drank. A cup in hand replacing a glass and a bottle of coke in the other replacing wine. I drank like how moody people drink on TV only that instead of alcohol I fed myself with coke. Cup after cup, I refilled and drank. Glup after glup I drank them all down into my stomach. I felt like crying but no tear could come out. It felt just like drinking.
Maybe the events of Shinichi was just affecting me very badly, and along with a couple of MSN chats I had with some people that made me feel even moodier. Shinichi is separated from his family, his dad's someone famous, and because he has to conceal his identity of Shinichi as Conan, he was not able to talk face to face with his dad in one of the movies I watched this evening. They merely communicated via eye contact and stuff. And I thought about a couple of things, including the conversations I held.
I talk about the first, it was actually yesterday that I talked to him. I can say he was the person who sold my soul. He was the one who introduced hell to me. And then he disappeared. Come one year later, he messaged me online again. After that chat I changed my nick to: "should i open up a can of worms? or should i do what kaito kid said "leave some mysteries unsolved"?" The quote from Kaito Kid is a quote from one of those Conan movies I watched yesterday, I'm really hooked onto them sia... Anyway, I didn't opened the can of worms. I don't want to know anything that might hurt me, especially since I'm now happy with myself.
Just now I got a compliment from someone whom I haven't talk to recently, and it was a compliment that I really appreciate. But in the midst of being happy with the compliment, I also felt a sense of sorrow. I don't know where the sorrow came from, amybe a bit of unease, maybe a bit of "vermissen", maybe a bit of something else I don't know.
I went swimming this afternoon too. I made 1.8km in a 50m pool. Previously I was in a 25m pool, and when I'm back home in Singapore, my pool is also a 25m pool so using a 50m pool is a refreshing change. It gave me more time to think about things as I swim. And I thought about a lot. Surprisingly, I didn't feel tired and could go for 200m before resting a bit. I thought about the novel I'm writing, and of course Shinichi and Ran, and a similar pairing, and of Ming and Adele, surprisingly I didn't think of Shan even though she's the main character, I thought of Adele. I think I should add scenes to her, and paint her in a better light, maybe I should even make Ming love her. That would make his position with Shan even more turbulent. hai...
I think it was yesterday or was the the day before yesterday, I was talking to another friend I haven't contacted in a long time. We didn't talk much and things got awkward that I had to find an excuse to leave. Then I had this conversation with another friend this evening. He gave me a scenerio, and as I probed further into it, I saw a shadow surface. I thought of that big bust up last year and all the mind(less) fucking I was doing. It was stupid of me, but I just can't stop myself from doing it, I don't know why.
Link myself back to another issue, it's the other friend I was telling the previous friend about. And when I add the issue of Ming and Adele into it (if you are starting to not understand me, it's normal. I'm now talking in code. maybe until the story of Ming and Adele hit the press, I guess you won't understand what I'm talking about.), things just got worse. If I put Ming and Adele into the shoes of Shinichi and Ran, could I salvage anything from it? Then what about Shan who's supposed to come in six years later. Am I to write her out to go from a major character to a minor one? Then I still need to think about Tian, and how things might affect her, and her life onwards. And the other guy... I named his as Xiang, but I called him Shi, but now I think a name like Xiong might suit him better, so what should I name him as? Or should I give him a proper name instead?
Am I mindfucking Ming or am I just teasing him? I don't know... I'd like to think that I'm teasing him, but more often than not things go way out of hand and I can't control the mindfucking. It's like becoming so addictive that I can't help but do it. I think it's all for a reaction. You want to see what comes out from it, so you do certain things, yes, I think that's it.
I personally think that if Ran really like Shinichi, she might fall in love with Conan despite their seeming age difference. I think I can safely say this, in the manga this is hinted. I can safely discuss about the manga here because I own all of them, all 50+ of them, neatly lined up in my bookshelf. I bought all until I left Singapore. They cost me a bomb since there are like 50+ of them. I didn't watch all the anime but I'm trying to watch as many of them now. I watch on youtube every day, and I watch it on RTL II every day when I don't have classes. My reasoning is that even though the "shell" is different, the "soul" is still the same. (This is yet another anime reference, from Fay, from Tsubasa Chronicles by Clamp.)
damn... I really want to know how Aoyama is going to end the series. Maybe I should do a bit of writing fanfics. I can safely say that currently all the fanfics out there are utter trash. Bad plot, no plot, bad grammar, no grammar, not sticking to the original personalities of the characters, and bad pairings of characters. sucks... And worse still, not complete. Serialised stuff is always bad since the mindset you can have today and tomorrow is different, there is of course continuity problems, not including others. And some writers don't even bother completing the unfinished work.
My mind's so jumbled up now. My dad just added me on MSN in his other email address, it's his nick and his car plate number. His nick, like mine, not xxoos, but the jal4eva, is derived from his own name, and more importantly, his surname. I just happen to know someone else whose MSN address happens to be the surname and the car plate number. What point are they trying to make, in letting the whole world know their car plate number?
Suddenly feel like going back home to my whole collection of Detective Conan and reading them all over again. I've noticed one thing about Conan in that if you compare the art work of the first book and the last, there are some differences to the characters. The art work is getting more and more fine tuned as the series drags on. It's almost like seeing Aoyama grow...
The traces in which someone matures... Watching him grow and blossom...
*headache* I think I'll leave movie 8 till some other day. I really think I should sleep now. Maybe I'll modify Adele's character a bit more, no, I shouldn't use the word modify, it's called fine tune. I'll make Ming love her. But should I compromise his love for Shan when I make him love Adele even more? Suddenly a scene between Heiji and Kazuha popped up in my mind, don't know why...
PS: I went to wiki Gosho Aoyama and realised that he's still so young. That can only mean one thing, Conan can go on forever, with us never to know what's going to happen to him. damn... He's going to suck all my money into buying all those mangas. Worse... What if he decides to piblish like 100 volumes of Conan, I'd be spending like $500 just on comics? wah lau...