Unconsciously

They sat side by side, chatting, talking, discussing, engaged in their little conversation, quite oblivious to everything else happening beside them. Other chatterings were ignore, background noises faded into the darkness, if the whole world were to be kept at a standstill, they would still be together. Or at least, that was what she thought.

Of course, she had no idea what he thought. She had no idea if he thought the same about their little conversations. She had no idea if he saw her as important as she saw him to be to her. She had no idea what he was thinking under the farce of his outlook. Even though she wanted to know what he thought.

He rested his left elbow on the armrest just as she rested her right elbow at the very same armrest. She was conscious of their elbows touching each other, but she liked what she felt. Of course, she didn't know if he felt the same too. If time could reach a standstill for her, she wanted to be holding his hand, no wait, she wanted him to hold her hand for eternity. This was an impossibility however. Time to them was limited to a couple of hours a week, and even in that couple of hours, he seldom physically touched her, their contact was kept to a superficial minimal.

She knew, he didn't feel the same way about her as she felt about him.

As they continued their little conversation, subconsciously, as she spoke, she ran her fingers over his arms, slowly caressing his arm. She didn't realise what she was doing. By the time she realised, her hand was already tenderly rubbing his arm. But he showed no sign of acknowledgement. Did he realise what she was doing?

She started resenting the fact that he didn't show any sign of response. Somewhere deep in her, perhaps, she wanted him to return than little physical gesture although she knew that it was quite impossible. Inside her, she still hoped. No matter how dim that glimmer of hope is, she still carried it down. It was this little sort of hopes that motivated her to stick onto him, continue her adoration for him.

Maybe he did felt her little touch after all, at the end of the day. Little gestures, little hints, and the fact that he knew that she adored him greatly. She really wanted him to appreciate her. Sure she did like the feel of his skin on her fingers, but what matter most to her that he appreciated that. She really wanted...

He leaned forward to her for a little kiss as they parted.

Yes, she thought, maybe he did really noticed her after all.